If there’s anything I’ve learned from being a cat mama, it’s that kittens are REALLY hard work. I like to think I was prepared for how much work TWO kittens would be … but I really had no idea. Here are just a few examples of the trouble my two girls get into together — teaming up in ways I hadn’t thought were possible! Neither one of them could do these things alone, but together, they’re unstoppable.
My husband and I have both walked in on them at this excursion before. We’ve never seen how they do it, but somehow, the two of them team up to pry the refrigerator door open. Their mission is simple: STEAL. ALL. THE CHEESE. We’ve found them, thankfully, only a couple of times, on the kitchen floor, deviously digging into cheese or meat stolen from the fridge. One of those times, however, we didn’t catch them in time before they had stashed some of the cheese around the house — a stinky discovery we made later.
I don’t mean this literally, in case you are picturing two furry babies in SWAT gear kicking my doors down. Freyja has a bit of weight to throw around, and she has shown Luci how to run full speed at a shut bathroom or catio door and slam into it like a little furry battering ram. As a result, humans peeing in peace is a thing of the past in our house, especially because most of our doors lack latches. The kittens have even started trying this on the outside door if we’re in the back garden. Nowhere is safe from the terrible two.
Freyja, who is usually my good girl, started Luci on this bad habit as well. My husband has a tall white wardrobe in our bedroom, one we found up in the attic when we moved in. The latch on it isn’t great. Cats love the tops of wardrobes, so you know this one is no different. But Freyja has figured out how to open the doors, from the top of the wardrobe, with one paw. It doesn’t stop there. Freyja then crawls in the top — Luci following not far behind — and they start digging, until all the shirts they want out of the way are uncerimoniously flung to the floor and they can make a proper kitty nest in the wardrobe. Sometimes it’s also a great launching pad for a pounce.
This was bad enough with just Freyja, but with Luci too? How can I stay up with those two begging me — and herding me — to bed? They first teamed up on an interesting night in our house, though not an uncommon one. I had been working that night at the local punk venue and was hosting the band members back at my place afterward so they had somewhere free to sleep and grab breakfast. We, of course, were still up at 4 a.m. The cats were not having any of it. They began to meow, very loudly, with much demand, and literally herd me upstairs to bed — one on either side of my feet! What could I do?
On the flip side, the girls team up to the exact opposite end. It starts with Lucipurr. Around 5 a.m., she sits on my husband’s pillow. She then begins to bap him on the head with her paws. Bap. Bap. Bap. She’s seeking to get under the covers and stretch out between us, purring, for at least 30 minutes. Bap. When he doesn’t respond, she extends a single claw … and sticks it up his nose!
But that’s not the end of it. When she’s had enough of her toasty nap time, she moves to the end of the bed and begins the toes attack. And as soon as Freyja hears me even roll over and open my eyes, she runs up the stairs, jumps on the bed, and rushes right to my face to meow — loudly and incessantly — until I get up.
I put a child safety lock on our kitchen cupboard. Before we did that, the above picture was part of my morning routine. The kittens figured out, with teamwork, how to get their paws just inside the door and heft it open to get at all the goodies inside. Not only does that cupboard hold all the lovely kitty food, it also has one of their favorite toys — plastic bags. So of course, they would then hop inside the cupboard and empty it all over the kitchen. Thanks, guys, really, I love starting my mornings this way.
Have your cats teamed up against you? What sort of shenanigans to they get into together? Have you found that having more than one cat is double the trouble? Tell us in the comments!
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About the author: Hana lives in Belfast after moving from the U.S. of A. with her two spoiled kittens, two chubby rats, and one cheeky husband. Hana works in admin but occasionally goes on tour working for an Austrian death metal band. When she’s not putting up road-weary punk rockers and metallers, you can find her taking the cats around town in their stroller, whipping up new recipes, or playing way too many video games. She writes at Mommyish and Catster. Follow her on Twitter and Tumblr.