I’ve never really been a fan of watching sports — live or televised. My favorite parts of Super Bowl parties are the snacks and cocktails … oh, and the Puppy Bowl (with the Kitten Half-time show, of course). I’d never sit down by myself in front of a football game; however, I would sit down by myself to a giant plate of buffalo chicken dip and pita chips. Sometimes I’d forego the chips and grab a spoon.
Instead of watching football (go sports!), I prefer to chow my giant plate of dip and watch the nonstop excitement happening live in my living room: my cats. They don’t wear jerseys or helmets, but the action is always entertaining and I don’t have to memorize a bunch of crazy rules.
Here are 7 reasons watching cats is just like — or better than — watching football.
Sometimes my cats have possession of a mouse or jingle ball and then — just like that — it slips out of their paws. This is good news for the other cats, who immediately go after the newly-fumbled toy. This move is always a nail-biter.
In my house, Phoebe is always intercepting toys from the other two cats — and for that matter, she takes my stuff too, And she looks so proud and showboat-y when she does it. It’s like she’d just scored a touchdown and doing one of those ridiculous victory dances that looks like the Funky Chicken.
Generally, my cats don’t collaborate on much of anything, but every once in a while, they band together to go after the other “team” — usually a bug. Phoebe is the quarterback, Cosmo is the runningback and Saffy watches from the sidelines. She’s the laziest cheerleader I’ve ever met.
In football, a team is given four “downs” to move ten yards across the field (don’t get too impressed — I had to look that up). In our house, my cats are given “downs” as well … as in “Get down from the counter!” Our cats get two “downs!” before I advance them to the floor.
It always happens: As soon as I leave the room to grab snacks or visit the restroom, I miss the best plays. Unlike football, my cats are not likely to offer up an instant replay.
Many people like to gather and enjoy the bowl games at the end of the season. Well, I get to watch bowl games every day. At mealtime, my cats are constantly trying to trade bowls, which is a no-no because Saffy eats special food. I can’t take my eyes off them while they’re eating. At least I can say I have the best seat in the house.
Everybody likes to see a good tackle. I’ll tell you what — 250-pound football players have nothing on these 10-pound cats. They chase one another with lightening speed, and then one will wind up pouncing on the other and pinning him to the floor. Sometimes they’ll roll around a little before one comes up victorious. You never know what will happen, but you can definitely count on edge-of-your-seat entertainment.
How is watching your cats like watching football? Or a sport of any kind? Tell us about it in the comments!
About the Author: Angie Bailey is a goofy girl with freckles and giant smile who wants everyone to be her friend. Loves pre-adolescent boy humor, puns, making up parody songs, and thinking about cats doing people things. Writes Catladyland, a cat humor blog, and authored whiskerslist: the kitty classifieds, a silly book about cats wheeling and dealing online. Partner in a production company and writes and acts in comedy web series that may or may not offend people. Mother to two humans and three cats, all of which want her to make them food.
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