Why can’t my adorable kitties do everything I want them to do, and on my terms? Well, because they’re cats, that’s why. My cats are complete and utter teases, and they seem to know exactly how to push my buttons. They do it nearly every time — perhaps I will never learn. Alas, I continue to hope each new instance will be different. What’s life without hope, after all?
Here are five ways my cats tease me.
Why in the world do kitties lie with their glorious bellies exposed if they don’t want anyone petting them? It drives me crazy! Of course I respect their wishes, but I can’t help testing the fuzzy waters now and again, usually resulting in the ol’ fangs-and-rabbit-kick move. From them, of course. I only rabbit kick when I’m dancing … after a drink or two.
It’s sometimes impossible to snap a really great cat photo. Sometimes my cats tease me by posing perfectly! I mean, I couldn’t have asked them to look any cuter. Like a stealthy ninja, I grab my camera, aim and then one of them moves. Quoth the long-suffering Charlie Brown, “AAUGH!” Then I wind up with some kind of messed up shot, probably unusable and featuring cat butt. Thank goodness for digital. Kitties, don’t tease me with these poses if you’re not going to follow through!
Occasionally I’ll catch one of my cats looking at me, seemingly asking me to pick them up for a cuddle. I can’t just sit there watching her watch me — I have to make my move! What happens when I’m inches from picking her up? She runs in the opposite direction. Sometimes she does that as I take my first step toward her. OK, kitty — I guess I’ll have to wait for you to come to me. Sigh.
Why is it that my cats do all this funny stuff, and as soon as they see they have my attention, they stop? Cosmo rolls back and forth, sometimes stopping midway to air his loins. I find this hysterical, but I have to pretend like I’m not watching him or he’ll stop! Phoebe does the same thing when she’s chasing a bug. She looks so funny, jumping and tumbling. If I don’t spy peeking around the corner, I’d never see it.
When I see my cats stretched out on my bed, I immediately want to snuggle with them — especially if there are two or more, which is rare. Unless they’re totally or nearly zonked out, they (namely Phoebe), jump right off the edge of the bed as soon as I begin my descent. Cosmo is really the only cat who will snuggle in bed with me. I want to lie in bed, draped by all three cats. Is that too much to ask for? I think not. Cats, here are your choices: Stop teasing me with your cuteness, or let me cuddle with you! I know I will never win. They’ll continue to look adorable and I’ll be nice and leave them alone … most of the time, anyway.
Are your cats total teases? Tell us in the comments!
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About the Author: Angie Bailey is an eternal optimist with an adoration of all things silly. Loves pre-adolescent boy humor, puns, making up parody songs, thinking about cats doing people things and The Smiths. Writes Catladyland, a cat humor blog, Texts from Mittens (birthed right here on Catster) and authored whiskerslist: the kitty classifieds, a silly book about cats wheeling and dealing online. Partner in a production company and writes and acts in comedy web series that features sketches and mockumentaries. Mother to two humans and three cats, all of which want her to make them food.
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