GO!

Help! I'm new and nobody likes me!

This is a place to gain some understanding of cat behavior and to assist people in training their cats and dealing with common behavior problems, regardless of the method(s) used. Keep in mind that you may be receiving advice from other cat owners and lovers...not professionals. If you have a major problem, always seek the advice of a trainer or behaviorist!

  
Trudy

I'm new! Play- with me!
 
 
Purred: Sat Sep 8, '12 7:26am PST 
I was so happy when I my new mommy and daddy took me to my new forever home. I've been here for two whole weeks and, at first, things were okay. They kept me in a separate room but then I was able to go out to the other rooms and explore the house. There are two other cats that live here, too. One is Socrates and he's 15 years old and there's Cookie who is 4 years old. Cookie has been here for 2 years and Socrates has been here a very long time. Socrates doesn't bother me, but Cookie keeps attacking me.

Just this morning, I was drinking water and not bothering anyone. Cookie came in looking like she was going to pounce. I just kept drinking water when suddenly Cookie really did pounce. I ran. Daddy yelled.

Mommy and daddy don't know what to do. Is this normal? Should we all just be patient until Cookie realizes that I don't want her place, I just want to share a place and have a home too.
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Juliette

1252984
 
 
Purred: Sun Sep 9, '12 5:45am PST 
Listen, please don't yell at your cats. It makes them stressed. I used treats when mine were in the room together. Alex doesn't get them unless Juliette is there too. Get them used to be spoiled when the other one is nearby. Juliette hates his treats so it works out well. Ours wrestle and then groom each other. Alex is nine years old and acts like a kitten. Your four year old is just establishing the order. Alex used to follow Juliette from room to room to check her out. He is now content with her. He loves grooming her. Also, use some catnip to relax everyone. I haven't had to do this. Praise them when they are doing well but say nothing. When we watched Alex who is fifteen pounds wrestle with our four and half pound kitten, it was nerve-wrecking but he was so gentle with her. She was small enough to get away. Now, she is six pounds and she starts the wrestling. They always end it with grooming each other. It is so neat to watch....Now relax, your two will be fine...don't expect the seniors to be excited about a kitten.
They just want to sleep and sleep......
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Trudy

I'm new! Play- with me!
 
 
Purred: Sun Sep 9, '12 8:59am PST 
Thanks for the advice. We've gone the treats and catnip route. This morning we had a long playing session with both at the same time. They seem a little more quiet today but the 4 year old is still on alert. Trudy isn't a kitten though. She's 2. Believe me, we don't yell at our cats. It was just the one time when things just blew up out of control. It lasted for a second and everyone went about their business. We were more effected by it then they were.

I hope they will eventually be friends, but if not, just to be able to live together would be okay too.
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Maizy

I may meow to- you if you're- worthy
 
 
Purred: Tue Sep 11, '12 7:09am PST 
It does take a bit of time for everyone to learn to co exist. I had a bit of trouble with Tigger smacking Felix around, and I got a FELIWAY diffuser, and I am telling you it worked miracles. I could see the tension ease from Tig. Maizy does not really like any of them (she would be thrilled to be an only cat again) but she learned to tolerate them all, and they know she rules the house.
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Trudy

I'm new! Play- with me!
 
 
Purred: Tue Sep 11, '12 4:06pm PST 
I'll have to look into the Feliway defuser. Thanks for the tip!
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Benjamin

Tiny Creature
 
 
Purred: Tue Sep 11, '12 11:11pm PST 
I've had some cats that just tolerated each other for their entire lives, and never really interacted. It happens, despite our best efforts to the contrary!
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Star

1267959
 
 
Purred: Wed Sep 12, '12 7:36pm PST 
Whenever introducing cats to my household, because I have had two of them for 10 years plus and I constantly take in injured or abandonded cats, I always put a few drops of pure vanilla extract on my hand and rub my hands together and then pet each animal for about a full minute, especially around their scent glands. It makes everyone smell the same, the vanilla is potent enough to cover their indivual scent and they realize they smell the same so they must be ok. This has never worked on my female manx though, she hates the newest animal everytime. She hates new people as well. This has never changed in ten years, but in a house of 3 cats and 2 dogs, nothing serious has ever happened. She just always projects her hate onto the newest member. She hated our oldest dog until we got the new dog this year, now she hates the new dog. She will never change!

It's uncommon for them to keep up the I hate you fascade, but I know only a handful of people including myself that this behavior of a specific cat has never lifted. I also find females are the worst to accept new members than males. Just seems to take the gals a bit longer I think.
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Trudy

I'm new! Play- with me!
 
 
Purred: Thu Sep 13, '12 4:24pm PST 
Thanks for the advice everyone. They are sniffing each others noses without hissing! That's a good sign, right? If they never became best friends, I'd be okay with that. I just don't want any attacks.
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Tigger

Knead softly &- carry a big purr
 
 
Purred: Sat Sep 15, '12 9:00pm PST 
sniffing is good! Tig went from smacking Felix to sniffing, to licking his face within a few weeks. IT really will be ok. Thay just all need to puff up & assert their "Hey I was here first" attitude.
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