|Purred: Thu Jan 31, '13 7:34pm PST |
|Winnie says, "Hey, if Pearl got to describe her picture, then I get to talk about mine! For you younger pups out there, you must learn one very important thing about life with humans: they can do everything faster and better than you can. When I have an itch, I skillfully position myself very close to my humans and scratch away, and whimper most dramatically. 'Winnie!' They exclaim, and then rush to my aid with a good ol' rubdown. When I want food, I send Pearl over to the food dish and have her clang against it most insistently until they come and fill it up. And, most importantly, when a dog wants to sleep somewhere comfortable, there is no place better than a human's lap. To get such a desired position, all you must do is dig around in your bed for a while, then lie down, then hop up in distress and circle three times. Then plunk yourself down again, sigh discontentedly, and repeat. Do this until they finally get the hint and pick you up. Sadly, most humans are very thick-headed, so it may take them quite a while to figure out what you want. However, they are easily trained. Just be sure to reward them with a lick on the cheek and some enthusiastic tail-thumps when they do it right. Now, if you'll excuse me, I've landed a comfortable spot on someone's lap, and I'm looking forward to a long nap."
The Practicality of Life
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