|Purred: Thu Jan 17, '13 7:24pm PST |
|This week has been a little rough for me. I go to bed thinking about the piles of homework I have, and I wake up wondering how much will be left at the end of the day. And then, there's missing my friends. Two of my dear friends had to go back to college this week, which means that there are several hundred miles between the all of us. Being together at Christmastime was so wonderful, but now that they're gone again, it's like losing them, in a way. Especially today. Today was the first choir practice since Christmas break, and did I ever miss those two girls! It's so hard when they're so far away. And relationships are changing, and change scares me. People I grew up with are getting married, they're moving away, their personalities are developing, our relationships are evolving, and in some cases they're morphing into relationships I don't like. Our bonds are changing. Some getting weaker, some stronger. Some are intertwining with others.
Recently, I've had trouble giving up control of situations. The morphing relationships, the friends who have moved away, the struggles I have with my new horse, the tension I must overcome in my singing: each of these terrifying situations could be easily overcome if I simply relinquished control.
As human beings, we can get so caught up in relationships. We often worry ourselves about who likes us and who doesn't, and we fret when our appearance isn't just so, or when we say the wrong things. We try so hard to make everyone like us. Thankfully, our dogs aren't that way.
Winnie is always there for me. Somehow she understands how difficult it is for me to relinquish control of my surroundings. No human being understands my dilemma, but my dear little terrier does. When I have troubles I can't tell mere humans, Winnie somehow understands it all, helps bear the weight of my burden, and never fails to give me kisses when I rub her ears. She is my first dog, my strongest bond.
Taking this picture was a challenge for me because I am in the picture! Winnie was sitting on my lap, and so I wasn't able to look through the viewfinder while I took the picture, which was a bit scary, because it meant giving up some control. But I do like how it turned out. It is officially the first successful picture I have taken without looking through the viewfinder. (sorry for the terribly long description and narcissistic ramblings!)
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