|Purred: Tue Aug 20, '13 9:46am PST |
|Hi everyone, I'm Suzy and have officially been a member here since July 30, 2007, coincidentally the same day (just different year) my fur baby died. He was only at month away from turning 17. I may have made him older than he really was, earlier when I said he was 16. I'm not sure when I updated his profile. I never really came here, and kind of feel stupid saying all this in front of you that I never came here to support! so sorry.
Tom had chronic renal failure and couldn't go on another week. Tommy was at one time a 20 pound cat b/c he was a very big cat, with huge muscles who slowly but surely turned into a frail feline who looked sickly and tired. In fact I told my husband that when my eyes met with Tom's eyes they were usually his big green eyes as he was a pure black cat. But they were all red and glossed over. When his eyes met mine, Tommy didn't have that 'happy-go-lucky presence to him anymore. When he looked at me towards the end, I swear if he could talk, it would have been "Mommy, I'm sick, tired and sad." I brought him to the vet since March of this year about 5 times. Nothing would cure Tommy. It was his time. Plus 17 years is a long lifespan and somebody told me shortly after Tom passed that the age was an indication that I was a good pet parent. Although nobody can help it if their young cat gets a deadly disease.
I have to say being in the room during euthanization on July 30 at 2:30pm, really did kill me. The entire process kind of traumitized me to the point where I really feel so bad and guilty now. I didn't know how dramatic it was. I just ran out crying. I don't think I can ever get another cat again. He was it. How could I top the best cat in the world.
One good thing has happened since his passing. I had a dream that I saw Tommy sitting on the floor looking very young and healthy again, like he was 5 years old!
Well, take care,
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