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How to 'Let Go' of a Foster

This is a special section for cats needing new homes and for inspiring stories of cats that have found their furever home through Catster or through the love and energy of rescuers. This is also the place to discuss shelters, rescue organizations, rescue strategies, issues, solutions, etc. and how we can all help in this critical endeavor. Remember that we are all here for the love of cat! If you are posting about a cat that needs a new home, please put your location in the topic of your thread so those close by can find you! Make sure to check out Catster's cat adoption center!

  
Delilah- (Adopted Feb- 2012)

Theres the resta- my Moustache?
 
 
Purred: Tue Feb 7, '12 1:44pm PST 
Everyone I need help! smile

As many of you know, we are fostering a wonderful cat named Delilah. Delilah is literally the perfect cat. I love t his little purring furgirl.
We are working with a local rescue to find her a good, loving home. That said, I'm wondering, those of you who foster, how you 'let go' of those you foster.

Would I keep Delilah? In a New York Minute. That said, I've been reminded, and have to keep telling myself that it's not fair long term for Delilah, or for my other cats. You see, we live in a small space, and Delilah is 'rooming' with Natalie. Natalie isn't wild about the idea, but she's tolerating it...truthfully, Delilah would love to be her 'friend' but Natalie would rather keep the relationship 'professional'. (she hisses and growls and yowls at Delilah-the same thing she does with every cat. CK likes Delilah, and goes in to play and visit daily.
Would I keep her if I could? I want to now. Yet, I know that the problems with Smokie haven't gone away and my vet and I had a long talk about when Princess came to us that she feels Smokie has alot of displaced aggression issues and they get taken out on the other cats he can do it with-Bella and Princess, since he can't get to Natalie.
Also, while we can do financially this for awhile, we walk a tightrope with finances here. We have trouble balancing the vet needs of the ones we have, and we have 2 cats so far with recurrent medical needs and another that needs to be seen soon. So, being responsible, and I'm trying to be, we feel that placing Delilah in a loving, responsible home would be for the best.
But my heart hurts at the thought of losing her.

Can anyone who does foster work advise me, please?

Thankyou,
Deb (Delilah 'Lila Kittyface's) foster Mommy
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BK

Ambassador at- the Kitty U.N.
 
 
Purred: Wed Feb 8, '12 5:11am PST 
I foster and it is difficult to give some of them up. For one thing, I try not to keep each foster too long. I think they get attached and comfortable and I get more attached the longer they stay. But I take in a lot of special needs fosters so some do stay longer. But if I kept a third cat (BK is adopted and Callie is a permanent foster) I wouldn't be able to foster anymore. So I try to think of what's best for everyone. Your foster will get a home where no one is picking on her and you'll have room for a new foster. That's the only way to do it. The cats' happiness is more important than ours.
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Benny Grunch

Will Meow for- Treats!!!
 
 
Purred: Wed Feb 8, '12 6:43am PST 
It sounds as if the best thing for the cat and you, would be to let it go to a loving, furrever home. I know how you feel, you do get attached to them. However, if you say you own two cats with medical issues, and finances can be a problem.....it would be the right thing to do is let her go. And then you will have room for another foster needing a temporary home.

Keep us posted....

The New Orleans Kitties
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Maizy

I may meow to- you if you're- worthy
 
 
Purred: Wed Feb 8, '12 8:57am PST 
I can feel for you - that is how Maizy ended up staying. We fostered her from 1 week old, and by the time she got big enough to spay - I couldn't give her back. Then I found out that with her food aggression she may have been put down for sure she was staying- she worked her way into my heart & into a non-cat person's heart too, and now I have 3. This being said, I hope that you can find a home for her that you can still either visit or keep up to date. She sounds like a sweet girl, and you are giving her a chance at a new adventure. You really are doing the best thing for her in the current situation. Kind of like watching your child move across the country. I had to let her go & she is happy but boy does it hurt. If I could accommodate Delilah, I would, as I know how special she must be, but we are far away, and I couldn't afford to myself as Tigger is special needs & I try to feed the strays. Best to you & for all you do - you are a special person. hug
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Strega

Live long and- purr loud.
 
 
Purred: Sat Feb 11, '12 8:50am PST 
My family has fostered for a number of years. When we first started one of the foster coordinators told us that she had rescued a whole shelters worth of animals by fostering. It is hard and my person cries sometimes but never in front of the adopters. We know that over the years we have now rescued a whole shelters worth of cats and kittens, too.
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