|Purred: Thu Sep 18, '08 11:54pm PST |
|do grandmeowmy stories count? my mommy's mommy was vacuuming the ceiling one dayi don't know why, mommy doesn't know why, she doubts her mommy really knows why. in order to do this inexplicable thing, she was standing on top of a very high bed. when she was through, she stepped down to the cedar chest...unfortunately, she got tangled in the vacuum cleaner hose...mommy says she HEARD the bones go SNAP. she heard at least two, turns out there were three breaks, one in the lower leg, two in the foot.
what really makes my mommy think HER mommy is dumb is what happened NEXT. her mommy, with her foot wiggling back and forth on its broken bone, insisted on taking a bath. mommy had to help. she insisted on shaving her legs. THAT might not have been a bad idea, as she was going to be in a cast for quite a long time, and it cut down on the itch. she insisted on deodorizing, perfuming and making herself up. fixing her hair. brushing and flossing her teeth.
at one point my mommy said: "you're already married, you know. you're not going there to snag a rich doctor."
she would not wear sweatpants until mommy pointed out that if the cast had to go up higher than her pants would allow she'd be going home in a paper hospital jumpsuit, and it was december. mommy almost threw up working a sock onto the wiggling foot, and flat-out refused to put a shoe on it, just stuck a slipper on it and called it done.
is that stupid enough for y'all?
(oh-she no longer vacuums the ceilings. she does stupid things, but it's intermittent, not habitual, and apparently she CAN learn from experience )
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