Catster

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It's Good To Be Queen...

Happy Birthday Fish Breath!

I was having an absolutely lovely, quiet weekend. The woman, the dog and the horse in disguise all left for the day on Saturday. I had the house all to myself. Nice!

The bliss ended all too soon though when they got home. I heard those hairy hooves on the hall floor and I knew it was back to business as usual.
They looked kinda tired though. The woman must have worn them right out. The dog had a big drink of water and went straight to the couch for a nap. The horse also had a big drink but he just plopped down right by the water dish and fell asleep.

Later on, there was more noise and commotion when they all woke up and made a big fuss over some cheap rubber thingee. Small things amuse dog minds.

The woman made a special and different fish dinner that was just for the dogs. She let me sample a bit of it and despite my insistence that it was too good for a simple canine palate... she served them up anyway. *sigh* I may need to train the woman all over again.

It wasn't long after dinner and the dog and the horse were asleep again. But not before the dog had picked all the bits of dinner out of the horses beard. Hmmm... I wondered if perhaps there wasn't perhaps a few choice morsels left when he was done. I approached the horses head cautiously and gave it a good looking over. It would appear that the dog had picked him clean. I gave one last sniff near his ear before calling it quits when he raised his head and yawned.

I could only sit down, squint and turn my head in disgust... fish breath! The horse went back to sleep. I won't be eating there again anytime soon.

We Are NOT Amused...

Just as the ratio of cats to dogs in the household was returning to a more acceptable level, not only does that woman go out and fetch a new pooch to bring home and pick the largest one she could find, she then proceeds to shamelessly flaunt them on Dogster for all the world to see... and all before she gets around to catering to the needs of, well... me.

So it was only fitting that I should re-arrange her cactus collection and up the vocal reminders that I had not been consulted prior to this blatant display of abuse of position.

Honestly, she thinks that just because she buys the food she runs things around here. She may have the dogs fooled but we all know better now don't we.

So there's a new lump of canine flesh to be whipped into shape. Perhaps it's just as well. It's been a long winter, sun spots don't last very long these days. A convenient distraction from the daily humdrum might be welcome.

I initially demanded that a complete background check be done on the new fellow. He seems large for a dog. I believe he may be a horse in disguise. I know he must be hiding something because he's very quiet and refuses to make eye contact.

I believe this horse knows that I know and in not wanting me to let the cat out of the bag so to speak, he's pandering to my wishes. Showing me respect and giving me room to move about freely - as if I can't see through that shroud of lies.

You just can't trust a horse in schnauzer clothing.