Fun in the outdoors

My chance came, an open door left unattended-I bolted!!!! Finally the cruel months of confinement came to an end, I was free and in the yard I previously had only seen from windows. I got to smell and explore and pee on grass, it was glorious! Aah, but then a problem. . . . .how do I get back indoors?!?!?!? The humans could not read my mind, and none of them had come outside to look for me anyway. All of the sudden strange children came at me from all sides! There was no escape!!! I was recklessly pulled from beneath the deck and returned to my 4 bedroom/2 bath prison :-( The strange man inside doted on me and gave me canned tuna, so all was not lost. My parents came back several days later. I think they must have been looking for me somewhere strange, because they took luggage and kept complaining of jet lag.

Three yards from the finish line . . . . .

Today the thread in mommy's sewing room attacked me. I fought valiantly. I dragged it through several rooms and tangled it around some furniture. Really it was quite artistic. I like to think of it as an installation, like in a museum. I don't know why daddy got so upset. He cut the thread, put me in the car & took me to the vet!!! The vet gave me medicine and yanked some weird stuff out of my tummy. So gross :-( Then after we got home I was locked in the back of the house and everybody kept checking the litter box. The next day daddy got all excited about my latest poop. The man clearly needs a hobby. He washed my poop and got all excited, making phone calls and everything. Write up a press release all ready! Is there no privacy in this world! He claims there was 9 feet of thread in my poop and hid all the thread in the sewing room. Such a worrywart. IT WAS ART!!!

Bird friend

I was so lonely yesterday and bird friend wanted to cheer me up so she let me pull her cage down so we could talk better. Mommy and daddy made such a big deal out of it. So what if a little birdseed gets spilled, I wasn't going to eat it. Mommy pointed out that the cage now has a hole in the base, she doesn't understand anything. I'm going to go sleep on her sewing things. Big meenie.

my bad, bad day

I started out the morning by removing the shiny metal thing where the heat comes from in the big people's room. Again they would not let me in the secret tunnel!! The food mysteriously disappeared last night so I tried to bring the people's attention to the problem. I tried knocking everything off a table, but they put it back, so I did it again, and they just put it back a second time. I attacked some furniture, that didn't work. I also knocked over the spiny plants and threw dirt all over the floor. I thought the people would appreciate the redecorating idea, but mommy got mad. She started to sweep it up, which I thought was a joke because they clearly look better on the floor in a pile where you can spread the dirt around. The morning was full of adventure, ah, good times. Then mommy got a special box with a locking door and put me in it!! Is she nuts ?!?!?!? She made me go in the car with two fighting children and then left me with some lady I don't even know. They poked me a couple of times, which I did not think was nice AT ALL!!! Next thing I know I'm waking up and the day is gone, and my bottom is sore. I don't even want to think about what happened while I was napping. I don't even remember having any cat nip, but the day is just gone. I'm tired again just from writing this. Good night.

Mystery Tunnel

Today I found a mystery tunnel in our house, but mommy wouldn't let me go down it. I was playing with the shiny metal thing on the floor where the heat comes out and the shiny metal piece came right out of the ground, I didn't even have to pull that hard. The tunnel was pretty and shiny and warm, but mommy said "NO!!!" I'm going to try again later.

My Big Adventure

Today I did lots of new things and kept my mommy running, maybe I have election fever. I tried to climb on top of the toilet tank to see the view, but mommy keeps a candle up there on a glass dish, it made a lot of noise on the way down. Then I got up next to the bird cage and practiced putting my claws between the wires. Bird friend came down and nibbled on my toes, but I don't mind. I think she was just being friendly. Mommy made me stop. I thought if I was going to get into trouble no matter what I do, I might as well have fun. So I tried diving headfirst down the kitchen trash. I made it all the way down to the bottom, but mommy pulled me out by my tail and fur. Thank goodness she was there, I don't know if I could have made it out on my own. Later mommy opened up the oven to clean it, once she took the racks out it seemed like a pretty good place to sit, but mommy wouldn't let me. She can be so mean. There were even a couple of things to bat around inside the oven but mommy said "NO!!!"

Applesauce

Today I was sniffing near the cage with the flappy thing with feathers. I think it wants to be my friend, but I can't really talk to it. Anyway, I found this interesting glass jar that smelled good, I tried to lick the bottom of the jar for yummies and then MY HEAD GOT STUCK!!! I ran around smashing my head on things, but luckily my daddy saved me. I'll try again later.

My Snake Friend

I brought a lovely garter snake friend out from under the couch last night, boy were mom & dad surprised!!!!! Mom jumped up, and Dad and Mom both started talking loud, I think they thought it was pretty cool. The ywanted to play to, so dad put me in the hallway and shut the door while they hid snake friend. I haven't found him yet but I'm still looking. . . . . I tried looking behind the television because there are lots of pretend snakes back there, I think I'm on to something because Dad got really excited and tried to distract me. The snake was still moving so it could be anywhere.