November 14th 2005 8:21 am
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Worse than a hairball -- WORSE than getting a Bath!!! The V-E-T!!!!
Grrrrrrowr!!!! I HATE going to da vet -- and to make things WORSE -- I overheard da Vet talking to Meowmie on the Tell-A-Phony. Da Vet sed that she and the WHOLE HOSPITTAL STAFF would be VERY happy if Meowmie gave me an Acepromazine before I got there. So I got this wonderful SKWISHEE treet -- called a Pill Pocket (whatever that means) with a CRUNCHY center and I ated it, and then I hunkered down and then I saw ... the .....Zzz ........ carrier monster, Zzzz..... and I tried to run but I was a little drunk and even though I ran a liddle bit in the closed room, I got grabbded by Meowmie and put in the carrier monster and we went to da Vet.
When Meowmie got there some SMART (haha) comments were made about my attitude, and Meowmie looked at one of the ladies behind the counter and sed "Has she ever swatted you?" and the lady smiled and said "No, but I've seen her in action!!" HEY -- they wuz talking about MEEEEEEEE!! SWEEEEEEET ME!!!
So then the LadyVet came to look at me and she had an assistant stoodent type person with her and I was so embarrassed -- in front of not one but TWO Vettie peepul!! The vet pointed at me and then LAUGHED and said to the stoodent "See?! It's working!" and they looked at my eyes that had the second lid coming down on them which means I am TRANKWILIZED -- But they soon learned (see, I tawt THAT stoodent something she didn't expect!!!) that just because I was trankwilized it DOES NOT MEAN THAT I AM TRANKWIL!!
So they weighed me (I am ONLY 14.7 pounds), and then the Vet Lady stuck her hands under my stummik and skweezed my stummik a liddle and I GROWWWLED! something NAAASTY and they sed "uh oh!!" then they did all kinds of other undignified things to ME -- the ruler of the world!! And then when they put me back into the carrier monster I turned around, stuck my arm out and SMACKED my Meowmie as hard as I could, before she could get the door closed!! Everyone just .... LAFFED!!!! Then on the way home I tried to open the carrier monster door but it's dubble locked, and Meowmie kept saying -- "I just don't unnerstand you, BBBT".
What part of "I HATE TO GO TO THE VET!" do you not understand, Meowmie?!
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