December 12th 2007 11:32 pm
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I knew there was going to be a problem when there was no food dish this morning. I desperately told my mom and dad they had to feed me, but they wouldn't. Instead of feeding me they put me in my carrier and took me to the vet! And left me there!
I got a needle in my arm! I got poked and prodded! They gave me drugs! Oh, it was awful! I tried to make them stop but there were too many of them! Oh, it was horrible, absolutely horrible, I tell you!
Something happened and I fell asleep. Eventually I woke up without an eye and without that nasty tooth that had been bothering me. For some reason I wound up on a multi-colored roller coaster that went into outer space and came back every two minutes. It went around and around and up and down in big loops and circles and dippity-doos. Funny music kept on ringing in my head, like bells and gongs and whistles. Somehow I wound up in my cat carrier but it kept on undulating like the waves on the sea. It never did that before; it was most strange.
Some people who were a lot like my mom and dad came and took me to a place that was a lot like the bathroom of my house except it was all goofy-looking. The walls wouldn't stop rippling and the floor kept on flipping over to whack me on my side. I was pretty sure I wanted to get into the bedroom and get under the bed but something kept on getting in my way; it took me a while to figure out it was the door.
The people who were a lot like my mom and dad gave me some food but for some reason I couldn't seem to reach my food dish. A strange plastic cone seemed to be attached to my neck, preventing me from accessing it. The man a lot like my dad gave me some medicine and after a few minutes the room wasn't spinning quite as fast and my head stopped throbbing. The people moved me into a larger room that was almost identical to the kitchen in my house, with towels on the floor and some food and water for me. The food was ooey-gooey wet food that smelled really, really delicious, but the man had to make the plastic cone go away for me to eat. Oh, it was heavenly! It was so delicious! I began to recall dimly what it felt like to be a normal cat again, instead of some weird freaky zombie clown.
My mom and dad sat on the kitchen floor quietly talking and looking at me now and then. I decided I was going to sit and look at the walls until they stopped wobbling. Maybe my stare would make them keep still. I gave the kitchen door a good perusal for a while. Then I examined the wall in the hall for several minutes, keeping very still because I thought the snack I'd just finished might come right back up again. But it was a false alarm.
Then I decided it would be a good thing to rest atop my cat tree, so I followed my dad into the bedroom and jumped onto the little table. But that treacherous table wobbled right out of my way at the last second and I fell onto the carpet. My mom and dad rushed over, but they didn't know the carpet didn't feel anything because I got up again and it didn't try to follow me. I think I floated up to the top perch, pulling my dad's hands with me. The window was filled with lots and lots of colored lights. Some of them blinked on and off. I thought this was the grandest thing I'd seen in a long time. I stared out the window at the dark night filled with little lights, some white, some different colors, all the way up the street. Some steady, some blinking, just like my eye, the only one I have left, and my dad and mom gave me kisses and I knew I'd sleep and be sailing around the pink and yellow daybreak clouds in a little boat with my name on it. I think I just saw Patrick, and he was singing me a lovely cat song. Wow, am I tired! Sleep.
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