August 25th 2009 4:01 pm
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It was really dark. Excellent for hiding, but tough for navigating... especially when there’s no scent to follow. I found a big bushy tree with lots of branches and leaves and climbed up, cloaked in darkness and foliage. I rested my back and my booty into a nook, so that no one could sneak up on me, but I could still see through the thicket. I stood on guard for quite awhile, nervous and hypervigilant, but my drowsy kitty nature eventually took hold and I dozed off.... until I woke to an awful odor...
I woke with a start. How could anyone know I was here? I am a stealthy kitty! And so well hidden...
I followed my nose down to the ground and the little voice below. There, at the base of my tree, was the weirdest looking cat I had ever seen. It was black and white, but not like Hemingway, who looks like a cow, or Simon, who wore a tuxedo. This one was bushy-tailed and had a white stripe down his back. He was clearly talking to me, with beady little eyes reflecting from what little bit of light they picked up from a distant porch light.
“Umm... hi?” I replied.
“Whatcha doing up there?” Mr. Beady Eyes asked.
“Sleeping. Sitting. Why?” I responded.
He shifted his weight, after which an awful wind wafted by my nose.
“Just curious. This is my yard, you know. Gotta make sure every is who they say they are, and that they are where they are supposed to be, you know. It IS my yard...” He shifted again, seeming a little agitated.
“Oh, well, I am just here for the night, then I will be moving on, don’t you worry.” I told him confidently.
Mr. Beady squinted at me. “The NIGHT? In my yard? Why don’t you come down here, so we can, er, talk about it. Face-to-face.”
The more anxious he got, the more he... well... stank. I knew I probably wasn’t smelling like a fresh batch of scented litter or anything, but he was RIPE. I got the sense that I was as close to that funky stench as I ever wanted to be.
“I think I’d rather just stay out of your way...er, your YARD... up here. I can see the next yard from my perch and in a hop, I’ll be out of your hair, so to speak.”
Mr. Beady McStinkerton propped his front paws up on the tree... “I’d REALLY rather you come down here, so I can see you better...” as he squinted, I tucked further and further into the leaves and laid flat against the bark. I looked for an escape route...
“I know this is YOUR yard, but is it YOUR tree? I mean, if you want to see me that badly, why don’t you come up here? There’s plenty of room...” I saw a path to the next yard, in case he called my bluff.
Stinkerton fluffed his fur and his tail went really straight. “I really didn’t want to mix with you, sir. But it is MY yard and I need to know that everyone is where they belong and who... they... are... supposed.. to... be...” With each staccato word, I knew it was time to get OUT of HIS tree and HIS yard. As I stood and jumped to the farthest branch, overseeing the back alley, that Stinkerton let out something AWFUL with that straight-up tail... I bounded away off the branch and onto the pavement opposite the yard fence just as I heard leaves rustle behind me.
I trotted at a good pace away from HIS yard and got away from HIS smell, but now where was I to go? I didn’t even have a place to hide until morning, so I could set out to find my furmily...
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Omigosh, you conversed with a skunk!
You are one tough survivor.
Eeeeuwww Buckley! Skunks are really stinky indeed! You were very brave... I am holding my breath until the next episode! xxx
You sure did a swell job avoiding getting hit by McStinkerton's stench, Buckley! You sure are a brave kitty!