This will be hard.

Mwe am wondering if meowmie can really type my diary. I'd hire someone else, but her feelings wulld be hurt. She went away to the beach for a week and wants to go back. Hisssssss. Mwe did haf good feeders, but why wud she want to leave mwe again? She has been fairly good about taking mwe for walks in the garden, and not combing me so much. Mwe haff furry long hair and she is always fussing wif me. Den mwe bites her. Tasty Meowmie!!

Will this be hard work.

Mwe furriend Playful told me all about dis purlace. I wonder if my meowmie can really help mwe keep a diary. She gets more sleepy den mwe does. Sigh. And she does't effen eat nipz. Oh, mwe forgot to say meow to my furriends..Hey, how do I find mwe furriends now? Oh well, back to sleep.