November 11th 2008 4:05 pm
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As many of you know, my poor sister Sissel has been on a diet. Well, I am getting tired of her being so MOODY-so I have come up with a way to make our mom notice how moody she is and start feeding her normal again. She will want to give her real food after this! Here is what I suggest Sissel do to get her attention:
1.Eat four blades of grass and one lizard tail. Throw it back up on the kitchen table.
2.Steal one green bean from Mom's plate. Bat it around the floor until it goes under the refrigerator. Leave it there!
3. Catch a large beetle and bring it into the house. Play toss and catch with it until it is mushy and half dead. Allow it to escape under Mom's pillow.
4.Eat your breakfast voraciously. Walk from the kitchen to the edge of the living room rug. Promptly throw up on the rug. Step into it as you leave. Track footprints across the entire room.
5.Drink part of the milk from Mom's cereal bowl when she is not looking. Splatter part of it on the nearest polished aluminium appliance you can find.
6.Beg and cry until you are given some ice cream or milk in a bowl of your own. Take three licks/laps and then turn the bowl over on the floor.
7. Eat six bugs, assorted varieties, being sure to leave a collection of legs, wings, and antennae on the bathroom floor. Drink lots of water. Throw the bugs and all of the water up into the bathtub.
Now if this doesn't get Mom's attention, I don't know what will!