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Sex: Male Weight: 10 lbs.
|Home:Columbia, MO ||[I have a diary!] |
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Catster stats for Pepper (In Loving Memory)
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April 15th 1989
Gray and White
He loved being outdoors, hunting and exploring the woods. He was very playful and affectionate, especially with my dad.
Another cat coming onto his territory. He never let them around without a fight.
I remember him chewing on dad's buttons, he would bat around balls and of course he loved hunting rodents and birds.
Favorite Nap Spot:
Probably it was on the deck in the sun, or in the grass under a tree where it was shady.
he was an excellent listener
Pepper's mother brought him and his two siblings one by one, through the woods to our house. My mother had seen a coyote just a day or two before she brought them. We believe she was trying to protect her children from the predator. Once the mother's family found where the missing cats had gone my sister and I had sufficiently begged my parents to let us keep one. Pepper had crawled up asleep underneath our concrete porch steps and could not be retrieved so it only made sense that we keep him. We all instantly grew attached. My dad, a self-proclaimed "dog person" was amazed that cats were as affectionate and playful as Pepper proved to be.
Pepper was with us until 1995 when his exploratory nature led him to stray a bit too far from home. Had our neighbor not found him dead in the road we may never have known what happened to him. Pepper filled a need for me that I did not appreciate until he was gone. In fourth grade every friend I had known through out school decided I was not worthy to be their friend anymore. After that, I shut down socially and lost faith in people. I believe that is why, today, cats mean so much to me. Though I had not been good enough to earn the love of my school comrades, Pepper loved me no matter what. I remember telling him everything, when I was scared or sad. I hid a wart on my toe for years because I was scared of having it removed (which of course made it VERY hard to get rid of once my mom found out about it). I can remember talking to Pepper and telling him how scared I was. He purred and licked the wart on my toe as if somehow he could make it go away. He has remained in my heart for all of these years and I continue to think about him. I'm glad that he died happy. I don't think he would have liked being an indoor cat. He had too much of an adventurous spirit. I know he is happy at the bridge and that he is certainly not alone. We have all lost beloveds and now they are there together.
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|February 15th 2007
||More than 8 years!
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September 25th 2011 2:10 pm
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Mommy adopted Miss Kitty one week after I travelled to Rainbow Bridge. She was absolutely heartbroken by it, and she had mean people tell her that I didn't go to heaven because I was an animal. I watched mommy suffer and agonize over this; because she did not believe these people; but their words made her fearful. I was helpless watching mommy go through this, and that is why I looked damaged to her when I showed myself to her in her dream. I was not the one damaged, I am beautiful and wonderful at Rainbow Bridge, but mommy carried scars on her heart for a long time because of the things these people had said. She even stopped going to church because of people like them, she did not believe anyone was in touch with God if they did not value the life of animals as highly as that of humans; especially since animals had loved mommy more truly and treated mommy more kindly than most humans who were very cruel and selfish. That is why I was very anxious to help mommy through the loss of Miss Kitty, who I knew would be leaving soon. I had not appeared to mommy in quite a long time. Right after I died she often had dreams that it was a mistake, that the kitty her daddy found and buried had not been me. She would dream that I came back. These dreams were not me visiting mommy; this was her brain grieving terribly for me. But I was watching her, and at this time I knew that she needed me, and that she was ready for me to appear to her. Here is the exact entry from mommy's dream journal; a dream journal that she keeps regularly.
Today is September 9, 2011 but I had this dream probably two weeks ago and never had the chance to write it down. But it stuck with me so much that I have to write it down. It really meant a lot to me actually. I haven’t thought about Pepper for a long time, well that is a lie because he is always on my mind a little bit. I could never forget him. But I hadn’t been deeply pondering him which is what makes this dream unique. I am standing in a parking lot. I believe I am on the sidewalk under the awning of a building and I believe I was speaking to someone. I have no idea who when suddenly my attention was drawn to the parking lot. There was a car sitting there, I don’t remember what the car looked like. However, sitting in the passenger seat of that car, and looking right at me was Pepper. I stared at him with an open mouth and my mind tried to process what I was seeing. Then I began to rationalize…no, it couldn’t be him. I recall the cat in the car had a completely white head, and Pepper clearly wore a gray helmet with gray ears. I also could not see the cat’s back to see if he had the two white spots on his back that Pepper did, but I couldn’t stop thinking about the cat.
I would encounter him later. He was sitting outside a doorway I started to pass through and I stopped dead in my tracks. This was clearly Pepper down to every last detail. In fact, I could even see damage from the accident that killed him, particularly on his legs. It looked like giant incisions that were raw and healing, but that somehow an attempt had been made to repair the damage. He looked at me with those huge green eyes. He made not a sound but his actions and the look he gave me spoke volumes. I knelt before him and let him sniff my hand. “Hey buddy,” I said, “Do you have something to tell me?” It was as if my subconscious mind knew that he had come to give me a message from beyond the grave. He leaned forward and head butted into my hand and I could hear him purring. Then he looked back up into my face and just looked at me. I believe I spoke to him more. “It has been such a long time since I have seen you. I am so glad that you have come back to visit me.” It was then that I really began to notice the damage on his legs and I was horrified and upset by it. He wasn’t supposed to be damaged in the afterlife; he was supposed to be whole and healthy. But he did not seem to be bothered by it, he just kept staring into my eyes; my little man, my guardian angel I think perhaps sensing that I had reached one of the lowest points of my entire life and he came to me offering me his comfort by his mere presence, just as he had done in life. I realize how miraculous and important this visit was and that it may never happen again. Thank you my precious for coming to see me again, I love you and hope that someday you will visit me again.
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