On the Eve of the Second Day of the Month That Shall be- Known As "Pre-April"

There have been enough "things" that are not positive in this month to cause it to be known to my Earth family as "Pre-April" Oh, to be sure, there have been some wonderfully memorable moments in this month too, but I imagine one can not accumulate a human "lifetime" of experiences without lingering *wounds.*

Perhaps if not so many "un" days were grouped together under one monthly calendar heading. Perhaps if Spring and the bursting forth of re-newed life were viewed with Angelic eyes and not from human sight/perspective, things could be different.

I've scented the sighs of my family on the wind. Saw the glistening of their tears. Heard their wistful memories and talk of me.
I am pleased though when my life is recalled as a life of Love, of tenderness, of hope, of rescue and of happiness. You were my hope and my deliverance.

I was truly happy to be part of your family and you truly treated me, not as an "animal" but as an equal. I was family, even though I walked on four legs and wore my own luxurious fur coat. I am thankful for your intervention into my life. We were all "bettered" for the crossing of our paths. I came "out of my shell" for you, because you were worthy.
Because, I could trust you and feel safe with you.

I smile an Angelic smile to see you hug and kiss Gabby, worry over, move to heal and help Sweets through her recovery. Even Nuk (who is as much a "thorn" as any rose has ever grown from her stem) needs you.
Our familial chain is missing a link, it's true.... but I am and will always be as near as your heart, as your memories of me. Remember me with love, because that is how I remember YOU!

May every word you have ever spoken to console a family, wrap around you tonight and comfort you in the same way as a warm cloak. When you reached out and touched another's heart with your kindness, it was really me pawing and touching them, through you. As you helped heal another's heart, I too, helped heal yours.

Stay true! You are and will always be my Champions

Of Trust ~ Trust Given, Trust Lost and Trust Regained.

In any *relationship* (personal, occupational, consumer, or familial ) trust is integral. Trust, like respect is earned not ever demanded. Trust, if damaged can be repaired, but not easily and not quickly and not ever without consistency in action - words mean nothing in 'Trust.' The story of my life demonstrates this.

I had a home. I had a family. They told me that they "loved me." They told me that I was "safe and they would never harm me." I believed them. I still don't know what happened to change that, but one day they would no longer let me into their home, into their family. I was kicked at, struck by the same hands that had stroked me. I was run off and left to fend for myself. I was pregnant. I fended for myself as best as I could. I birthed my kittens and we were *caught* by some shelter people. They made sure that I had veterinary care and food and necessities. My kittens went to homes. I waited.

One day people came to the shelter. They looked at me, talked to me and left without me.
A few more days of such *visits* and then I was going home with them. "Home" ~ again to be part of a family and told that I was loved, safe and would never be harmed.

I was distrustful. I was fearful. I had heard these same words before and look what had happened. The actions had not matched the words that I had heard and I had been harmed anyway. These new people were patient. They were quiet. They did not force anything. Gradually, through consistency of action they gained my trust. I grew less and less fearful of being harmed. I never forgot the harms my first family put upon me, but slowly I learned to trust again.

As with any trust given and then lost - there were always small "seeds of doubt" Would the harm come and return some day? Would my tender trust be discarded carelessly again?

I am pleased to say that for all of my life with my second family, there never was a day that demonstrated that my trust had again been misplaced. In each day there were consistent actions that regained my trust. With each day of my life, my trust only grew and never shrank.

When a Trust is broken, it is only the actions of the ones seeking to be trusted that count. Words, do not matter.

WORLD CAT DAY- Questionnaire

Sweets' twin Ishtar first posted this Tag in honor of World Cat Day (which is TODAY ~ August 8)
This Tag is different though... It's a Tag for your humans to complete about you!
Even though I'm an Angel, I want to play too

WORLD CAT DAY-questionnaire

You know some people call us moody, stubborn, capricious or not willing to learn. what is your opinion about such cat prejudices?
Moody? - I would only have called you "moody" if not liking/fearing the sound of wind, rain, thunder, fireworks, qualifies as "moody."
Stubborn? - Again, this a prejudice that doesn't really apply to you - Once you understood you were safe, loved and put your trust in us, you were an absolute sweetheart.
Capricious? - This doesn't seem to apply to you either... You were a very *deliberate* cat.
I believe there was much thought put into your behaviour, into every action of yours. Much more *thought* than *whimsy.*
Unwilling to learn? - Not you, some human before us had taught you a lot of fear. In addition to your fear of "weather that you could hear" you had your distrust of men, your fear of a moving foot. (No kicking a crinkle ball towards you. You would see that raised and swinging foot as a *threat* and break my heart when you cowered.)

Tell me: how do you remember our first day together in our home?
We had been to your shelter two previous days, just visiting with you. On the Saturday that we picked you up, we did so on Chris' break. I got to spend 3 hours home alone with you before Chris even came home from work. You were nervous, you were shy. I sat in the bathroom and read to you from the Narnia Chronicles, just so that you could become accustomed to my voice and my presence and understand that i was no threat to you.
I wanted you to approach me on your terms.

You have taught me so much – but what did you learn from me?
You came with some very sweet, very important lessons. From you I learned the joy and importance of adopting an adult shelter cat. That first feeling of "It is not I who improved your life, but you who have improved mine" came from adopting you. In our short time together you showed me a depth of patience and forgiveness that I had rarely seen before. It took some time to earn your trust, to have you move past the fact that people had previously hurt you. For a cat who was scared of so many things, you understood that your present was not your past. Once we had earned your trust you opened your heart and loved us back with your whole being. All of these behaviours are lessons from you that I will try for the rest of my life to remember and model.

Have you ever wished – even for a second – that i was someone else?
No! Never! - I knew exactly *who* you were and what your issues were, when we adopted you.

What if we'd change bodies for a day?
I wonder if I would have been able to stop grooming myself! You had the softest fur of any short haired cat i have ever touched! I hate to think though, how scary such a change, suddenly finding yourself in a human body, would have been for you.

Could you name those of my habits you would not want to miss?
I can not name, I can only simply say that is was "everything you did." I am really heartbroken to say that I somewhat took you for granted.
I (wrongly) expected that we would have many more years together than we did. Once you were gone, it was so painfully apparent just how many little things that made up a single day of mine were uniquely yours. Once you were gone, I ached for each of the ways that you made your presence and love known throughout our day and I missed you terribly at each of those moments. It hurt horribly in the times when through your absence I would notice that there was no longer any *you* enriching that moment with your unique "Taagness."
If you want to add another "Lesson" that you have taught me, it would be that "Life is short, cherish each day for the gift it is, for we never know what the next day might bring."

Let's imagine we could go back in time – how would you estimate the probability that you would adopt me again?
100% yes. You were "planned" - We knew *who* you were, and we wanted to give you a safe, stable, loving home.

Just one last question: which big cats do you like best?
I have always love the Tigers.

Angels never rest ~ To all grieving parents, I send my love- and purrs of comfort.

Angels never rest...
It's true, but then again we never tire either. We are always saddened for your families but happy to see you!

Sometimes we furry family go suddenly, without warning. Sometimes we need help to go peacefully to the Bridge. When we need help it is really a testament to how much our family loves us that they would take on such pain to themselves to help end ours.
That one last deed of kindness so many parents must make is indeed a deed of love and bravery.

That bond of love that we shared with our families can not be broken by death. We live on in their hearts, in their memories and on one day... we will both be joyously reunited.

The same memories now that hurt, the small details that made up your days and lives together will one day bring more comfort than sadness. No one can say when that will be... The timetable is different for each furry family member and their family. I only know that it will be.

To all grieving parents, I send my love and purrs of comfort.

Thank You ~ and I have her!

Thank You Catsters, your hearts are kind.
Thank you ~ Tasha and Weeble (tiny kitten angel) for your comments on my photo.
Thank you ~ Monida and Aldo for your rainbow rosettes in remembrance of Pie
Thank you ~ Sugar, Simon, Ishtar, Lucy, Tasha, Monida, Oliver, Tigger, Calvin ~ Knead On, Sky, Ishtar, Kitty Pryde, Aldo, soc *PAWS*, Alfie, Simon & Ava Corinne for your kind thoughts and words on Nük / Anük's diary.
Thank you Cat & Kitten Angels who were there beside me to greet Pie. (and no one can miss that huge banner of Calvin's or the light of kindness that follows Ava Corinne everywhere she goes.)
Your extensions of kindness, understanding and sympathy make the heart ache ease.
You all make me VERY glad, that my family has such good friends!

I watched it all, the little light that was Pie on Earth... fading. I was not surprised when I saw her little furry waddle walk coming across the bridge. I was sad for my family though... But like any Rainbow Bridge Angel, I'm already looking for a little hamster who needs a good family. I will play "Matchmaker" and tap him or her gently on their little head and tell " Uletae, (Fly away) There is your Forever person, you're going home!"

The View From the Rainbow Bridge ~ Of Anger and Manners ~- Have We Ever Said "Thank You."

I am saddened and ashamed...
There is, what looks to be, self-righteous rudeness going on. Reprehensible comments on Dr. Barchas' blog. He, who has no more control over the advertisements on his blog than *we* do. No! Actually, members of Catster do have more control. We can write, we can dialog through proper channels.

While yes, I am saddened to even see the *N*named food advertised here. Here, where as Nuk has noted, we have some friends who either were irreparably harmed by or have lost their lives to this food company. My heart aches for their families and what they must feel when seeing these ads.

I understand that where there is *passion* - emotions run *hot.* ~ I understand the anger and I know that anger is most often the product of injury. When we feel hurt by the words or actions of others, we respond in anger. When we feel betrayed, insulted, cornered or are confronting injustice, we respond in anger. Yet anger always begets anger - the mirror is always at work. I am not saying "Do not be angry." - Anger unexpressed is anger unrequited and is physically dangerous to ourselves.

What would we think of someone who stands idly by while an animal is abused? Indeed, appropriate anger is acceptable to most of us. The key to effecting change is to be able to channel our anger and not just dump it whenever we feel it.
"Hello anger, I feel you, I respect you and if you will be patient, I will unleash you at an appropriate time, in an appropriate manner, or I will channel your energy into something useful. - Be patient."

But, I have digressed...
Are there things here at Catster that I am less than happy with? - Is this white background even more white than the clouds in the sky? - It just might be. Is there the need to hold comments from non members to the same moderating standard that members are held to? - Certainly. Are there *bugs* and *glitches* that still need to be worked out? - Sure.

Yet even for each of the negative things I have listed or could list, is there not a counter balancing positive?
This site (which members are very passionate about) exists because of an idea. Have we ever said "Thank You" to the originator of that idea?
Have we ever said "Thank you" for the days which add up to years of being kept *relatively* safe from troll, spammer, or shady types?
Have we ever acknowledged the behind the scenes work that goes into keeping this site up and running? When the *ride* is smooth all is quiet, when we hit a *bump* the resultant jar is disturbing and the protests come en masse.

About the protests themselves, Top Cat has given his mobile phone number and email to members for the purpose of listening to and considering their concerns. Have you ever had the Head of a website give you that much personal attention, be willing to listen to and be responsive to members?
I want to acknowledge and say "Thank you" for that.

I want to close with an analogy. We are guests here. Imagine, if you will, that I threw a party and opened my home to you. (For Plus Members, imagine that I charged you a *cover charge* for that party in return for a few extra benefits.)
While you are free to comment that the pretzels are stale or the music is not to your taste, *how* you approach me with such concerns will certainly influence my response to them. How I answer your concerns will influence whether you ever attend another party of mine.
As a guest though (even one who has paid a cover charge) are you entitled to disrespect me, my home, or other guests? Are you entitled to pee on my carpet? ~ No.

Con te partiròTime To Say Goodbye

Con te partiròTime To Say Goodbye

Andrea Bocelli - Con te partiròTime To Say Goodbye

Quando sono solo
Sogno all'orizzonte
E mancan le parole
Si lo so che non c'luce
In una stanza
Quando manca il sole
Se non ci sei tu con me, con me.
Su le finestre
Mostra a tutti il mio cuore
Che hai acceso
Chiudi dentro me
La luce che
Hai incontrato per strada

Con te partirò
Paesi che non ho mai
Veduto e vissuto con te
Adesso si li vivro.
Con te partiro
Su navi per mari
Che io lo so
No no non esistono piu
Con te partirò

Quando sei lontana
Sogno all'orizzonte
E mancan le parole
E io si lo so
Che sei con me con me
Tu mia luna tu sei qui con me
Mio sole tu sei qui con me
Con me con me con me

Con te partirò
Paesi che non ho mai
Veduto e vissuto con te
Adesso si li vivro.
Con te partiro
Su navi per mari
Che io lo so
No no non esistono piu
Con te io li rivivro.
Con te partiro
Su navi per mari
Che io lo so
No no non esistono piu
Con te io li rivivro.
Con te partiro
Io con te.


Time to Say Goodbye
----------------------

When I'm alone
I dream on the horizon
And words fail;
Yes, I know there is no light
In a room
Where the sun is not there
If you are not with me.
At the windows
Show everyone my heart
Which you set alight;
Enclose within me
The light you
Encountered on the street.

Time to say goodbye,
To countries I never
Saw and shared with you,
Now, yes, I shall experience them,
I'll go with you
On ships across seas
Which, I know,
No, no, exist no longer;
With you I shall experience them.

When you are far away
I dream on the horizon
And words fail,
And yes, I know
That you are with me;
You, my moon, are here with me,
My sun, you are here with me.
With me, with me, with me,

Time to say goodbye,
To countries I never
Saw and shared with you,
Now, yes, I shall experience them,
I'll go with you
On ships across seas
Which, I know,
No, no, exist no longer;
With you I shall re-experience them.
I'll go with you
On ships across seas
Which, I know,
No, no, exist no longer;
With you I shall re-experience them.
I'll go with you,
I with you.

**********************************
Oh Taag,

It is so hard to believe that already a year has passed since the day I had to (through tears) set your Catster page to "This cat is no longer with us" and write that diary entry that as pet parents is so hard to write...

We still miss you terribly and there are times when a memory or just looking at your Catster page has me sniffling and wiping away the tears. While we are so thankful that you were part of our family, you left a hole in our hearts that no other cat can fill. No other cat is ever, or can be ~ "you."

Thank YOU for the 3 years of love that you gave us and the many happy memories. Thank YOU for the comfort that you gave and continue to give to other families whose hearts are hurting from losing one of their beloved. Thank YOU for putting your pawprint on our hearts. Thank YOU for the times when a diary entry starts composing itself in my head ~ it's as if *you* want to speak. Thank YOU for the times that you came to us in our dreams.

There are times when we watch Gabby and she reminds us of you. Times when I say (even to Chris) that I really think you two would have liked each other a lot. She has even picked up your habit of coming into the kitchen at cooking time to keep me company. There are times when I wonder what you would think to see Sweets putting Nuk "in his place." Oh he looks so confused when she smacks him! As confused as he looked when he looked for you throughout the house and couldn't find you anywhere anymore.

Each song on your page is always and forever yours. I can no longer hear any of them without also *feeling* you. This latest one, "Con te partiro" when I first heard it, I knew it was for you.

Although our weather is the same this year as it was last year (that hasn't changed)
We'll be going out tomorrow (on your bridge anniversary day) to take a donation in your name to Sweets' shelter. That way kitties who are waiting for their forever families (the way you once waited for us) will benefit and have a Guardian Angel Taag.

Families of Angels

So many Angels, so many families. I know the holidays can be a hard time for you. Not only for the families of new Angels but the families of older Angels as well.
Their memories of the Life and Love we shared can cut sometimes as well as comfort them.

Be not sad families of Angels! For we suffer nothing. We do not regard our time on Earth with you with any regret. We are nothing but grateful for your Love and Care. Each moment that we were with you was a treasure for us. (Whether those moments were long or short matters not, for time has no meaning for us now at the Rainbow Bridge.)

What we remember and carry with us always is our thankfulness for your intervention in our lives. Because after you, we always knew Love.
You touched our hearts and you touched our Lives and we are forever grateful to have been part of your Families. Our pawprint is forever upon your hearts and there will remain for all Time.

A Family of *Obvious* Cats.

Watching over my family, it has occurred to me... That what they have now is a "Family of *obvious* cats."

In my life, I was pretty shy and mostly silent. I had my ways of "making my presence known"
Trying to pull Papa out of bed by his hair.
Coming into the kitchen when I heard cooking start, because it meant Papa would soon be home.
But... I rarely meowed or cried or made noises. I was content to sit with my family and purr. Or play with my toys near them.

I've seen into my family's hearts and I've seen there how they felt badly.
Feeling as if they'd "taken my presence for granted." I know that they've felt that they "didn't really realize all the ways I had integrated myself into their days and their lives - until I went to the Bridge and was missing from their home."
But, I want to reassure them, that I never felt "taken for granted" and I never doubted for even a minute, just how much I was loved.

Nuk has the personality of 3 cats... Well at least 2. (his super sweet affectionate self and his "wild man" antics)

Sweets is a darling who is not shy about getting what she wants. Whether that's affection, treats or anything else.

... and then there was me. Quiet, constant, consistent me.

When the Gabby rehoming started to come into place, I had no idea that the cat who would help heal my family's hearts was another "obvious" cat.

A girl full of coos and mews. A girl "you can't help but notice"
A girl who would step into my "pawprints" as "The People's Cat" and love my family right back, as much as they loved her.

In a lot of ways. Gabby and I have much in common. She is just more *obvious* about it.

It amuses me though to watch my family. My humans have their hands full managing a Family of Obvious Cats.

Or is it? The Cats who have their paws full managing my family.

I wish my friends and family a blessed, safe holiday.

Calvin, What I wanted to say...

The crowd of angels was so great around you, and I am so shy.

Had I been pushy like my brofur Nuk, I simply would've muscled my way up front to you.

Had I been demonstrative like my sisfur Sweets I would've called and pawed out to you.

But, I am me and so I hung back and I waited... patiently, for the crowd to thin out around you. So many angels, greeting you, taking you under their wings. Such a flutter at the Bridge.

I knew you by your striking green eyes, by your magnificent, regal bearing. (and of course by your over flowing heart basket) ;)

All I really wanted to say to you (on behalf of me and my family) was:
"We have been so blessed, to love and to be loved in return. Thank YOU with ALL our heart, for letting us share in your life."