Faster than a speeding mouse, more scary than a musk ox, it's SPARKMAN!

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I am Just an Overwhelmed Super Kitten.

November 8th 2006 9:38 am
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It has been such a busy time here! I just can't keep up. I am swamped with work. I mean there are not enough hours in the day for all my tail biting, curtain swinging, garbage pail diving, toe biting, toy tormenting, litter showers, lamp climbing, kitten naps, broom battles, chirping, chipmunk watching, bug eating, television attacking, house plant killing, or even my blanket tunneling habits! Sometimes I just get so exhausted I fall asleep right on the ball in track toy, or lay limply while gnawing on Capt. Morgan's ear. What is a kitten to do?! This house needs ten kittens, but there’s only me. And I'm sure glad I'm such a super hero, because I'm the only one who could make all of this happen!

But every now and then, I am just an overwhelmed kitten. Mom and Dad don't seem to notice the lengths I go to not to blast off into space or self combust with all this energy. At least my big brother Moose seems to be trying; he twitches his tail while he sleeps and all but tries not react when I pounce around biting it... such a noble deed! Thanks Moosey!

 

Am I GROWING?!

October 27th 2006 11:31 am
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Well geeez! I was trying toeat my lunch, and of course I DID decide to eat the big cat dry food and not the little cat dry food. But that's no reason at all for this! I was just munching along, minding my own business, when Moose walked past behind me. I got nervous and decided to eat facing towards him, just so i'd know where he was... I turned and backed up between the food dish and the water dish and kept munching. It is so good to eat the big cat food! So there I was munching along when I realized my butt was wet... then my back legs... then my tail... I looked behind me and jumped! Straight in the air! I had somehow managed to stick my whole rear end INTO the water dish! How did I get so long?! Am I growing or something?! I can't grow! This will spoil my cuteness! Oh, no! I'm going to get HUGE like Moose or Capt. Morgan!!!

I ran up to Mommy, who'd been watching me with a strange smile on her face... oh, she knew i was sitting in the water dish... anyways I sat my wet rump on her socked foot and cried. It was just so humiliating! I'm glad she washed the water bowl before anyone important found out... you know... like Capt. Morgan!

 

The Brilliance of Cow Milk!

October 24th 2006 6:36 am
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Every morning I want milk, and seeing how Captain Morgan doesn't let me nurse him, which makes NO sense! He's my new jungle gym, scratching post, chew toy, napping heater, bather, and masseur... why can't he give milk too?! I keep trying! But he just doesn't let me near his nipples.

SO I have to drink SOMETHING besides just water in the morning; I mean, Mommy drinks cough-ie every morning! So I wait until she gets the cow milk (what IS a cow? Cause it seems to fit in this jug in the cold cold box and produce so much milk... does it swim in it in the jug?).... She is SO easy to cat-ipulate.

What was I saying? *chews on own tail in contemplation* Oh, yeah! MILK! So so sooooo, Mommy gets out the cow in the jug that swims in milk and pours it into her cough-ie. I stand in the middle of the kitchen and go into hysterics. REALLY. I jump around screaming and crying and doing my best dying kitten routine: legs up in the air, head rolled as far back as it'll go. I am amazing!

Moose and Captain Morgan come running to save me, and here’s the good part; they start climbing Mommy like she's a tree; clawing her legs and screaming too; saying things like "Make him stop! SAVE HIM!!!" And I flop on my side, pretending to be completely out of breath. Then she has to walk over to the little sushi set (big cat on each leg and me jumping along between her two feet) and get out a dipping bowl for my milk!

And while she’s pouring that first one, I notice she pours a second in case Captain wants milk too... Which is a GOOD thing because he rarely does and my second helping of milk is right there!!! When she puts the milk down I jump up to attention right away to let her know I'm not really hurt... afterward I always run over and show her my milk beard! I’m amazingly cute.

phewww that was a long story. Nap time! *Purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr* *Falls flat across keyboard* ghudgjkxu

 

There's Like WAY More Than 10 Cats in the World!!!

October 19th 2006 11:26 am
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You know, I thought there were only me, my litter sibbies, and Mom in the world; then I found out about Captain Morgan and Moose... But now that I'm on Catster; there’s like WAY more than 10 cats in the world!!! There’s like a hundred... a thousand... a katrillion! Wow... so many tails to bite.... Where do I start?
(Silly question! *rolls on side and bites own tail*)

Thanks for all the treats and rosettes and stars!!! I feel so impressive! Its like when I climb all the way to the top of that carpet teepee thing that Moose sits in. I dodge his big paws and claws and I barely make it past the dangling feather strings without toppling off to bite them and then there’s Captain Morgan looking so tempting back on the ground with his tail tucked around him while he sleeps and I just close my eyes really really tight and keep hopping my back feet... phewww! I'm exhausted.

Time to curl up with Captain Morgan... *pounces on Captain's tail* *Chomp*
ahhhh, nap time!

 

Purrrrpose of tails.

October 15th 2006 7:13 am
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I figured it out; I am brilliant; I am AMAZING! At first I thought tails were just for other people to bite... you know like Capt. Morgan's exists mainly to be biten by ME!... But then yesterday morning I realized that that squiggly long snake of a thing on my rump is really there for ME to chew on! I can pounce on it and nurse on it and chase it around in a circle... and no one objects! Mom and Dad even cheer me on, and get that flashy thing [the camera]. Which, by the way, does not taste too good.
But thats it! mystery solved! I, the SPARKMAN, am amazingly brilliant and gifted. WOW! Gotta go bite Moose's tail now, just to be fair.

 

Let the sparks fly!!!

October 12th 2006 10:21 am
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I just love love LOVE to chew on the Captain. I think his tail tastes the best... oh, wait! Whats that!... sorry, just Moose walking past... Hey look! Its a moving ball!... gotta go jump on it... *pounce* *chomp*... what was I talking about?... I had another home once, but I really dont rememeber it much. But I had siblings that all looked EXACTLY like me, it was amazing!... My Mom is Captain Morgan now. He smells like catfood... Did I mention him yet?... Oh! Oh! It's a leaf! *Crunch*... *jumps and runs into wall*... Its hard being a kitten. I mean, I have so much energy I think I'll burst!... Captain's asleep! Time to pounce! Bye! *Purrrrrrrrr*

 
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