Faster than a speeding mouse, more scary than a musk ox, it's SPARKMAN!

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Made the "Active List!"

August 21st 2007 9:50 am
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Oh, boy! So exciting!!! I love it when I'm on a list somewhere! And today I made the ACTIVE LIST on the diary page!!! Whoo hooo! Gotta get back to playing tag with Moose... or napping with the Captain... hrmmm... so many decisions!

 

Double Feature: Invasion of the Giant Mugs and The Sink- Snatcher!

August 20th 2007 7:27 am
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Oh! The humans finally got something for themselves that I approve of! It's GIANT mugs!!! They're so big that I can finally (and you know I've been trying ever since that growth spurt) fit my head entirely inside them! So I've been checking Mom's mug for goodies. Last night I found fresh water in there! That was encouraging. But this morning I ran up, peaked in and found that yucky coffee stuff. Bleck! I agree with the Captain, that is just a cruel thing for Mom to do to milk (stick it in the coffee). It's like I'm a dinky guy again! I can test out whatever they're drinking! Whoo hooo!

But speaking of drinking... This morning I saw Mom was awake and ran into the bathroom sink and howled. (My normal routine, but one that I'm still training my human to obey.) So she hobbles in there and turns my water on. I got my drink and she wasn't around, so I just left the water running. Silly humans! I hate leaving the water running, but when your human wanders off without standing at attention behind you, what's a cat to do?! So I left the water running. And Moose comes along and he's all curious about the sound of running water. We used to have a water fountain in our water dish. But Mom had to "unplug it" whatever that means because she said we kept clogging it by putting out food and toys in it. Moose has never forgotten about that crystal fountain!

I wandered back in and found him nosing the water stream trying to decide whether the water was fit to drink, or too cold for his palette. Did I ever tell you that he's a connoisseur of water? he takes tiny drinks and lets the water just roll down his tongue. I think he even swirls it around before swallowing, just to let out the flavors... He sits by the water dish for hours making faces like "Ahh this water has a good nose. I taste catnip and mouse." Then he walks around with a wet chin. Doesn't even notice it! Captain and I enjoy laughing at the wet chinned water taster!

I naturally started chirping at him to get his attention and ask what the heck he was doing in the sink, when Mom heard me. She came in and found Moose standing in there with a wet chin, immediately ran to find the camera. When Dad's not home, we get photographed A LOT!

Moose being a paranoid, shy guy, took all the action to mean that he was in trouble with either me or Mom and headed for the hills (aka the living room carpet). Mom came around the corner with the camera to find only me in the bathroom, sitting and looking excited... Could Moose be becoming a sink drinker too?! Surely if there's two of us the humans will have to pop for that motion detector sink Mom's been mentioning! Imagine; I jump up there and it turn on. I jump away, and it turns off!! That's one less job I'll need the humans for! And it will help me be a green kitty conserving water.

Oh! Mom just filled her giant mug with something new... I better go check it out! Purrs everykitty!

 

Potatoes Now Included!

August 16th 2007 6:46 pm
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My best friend Chrissy noticed that my beloved veggie of happiness, aka PO-TAH-TOES, were sadly and tragically absent from my bio! Oh, no!! How did this happen?! Well, my bio was written when I was like 3 months old and really spent most of my time just worshiping my Captain Morgan hero and well... chasing my own tail... NOW, 7 months later! I have many many talents and super habits!!! I don't just worship Captain Morgan and chase my tail, now I worship Captain Morgan, chase my tail, AND keep potatoes as pets!!!... Seriously, though. I NEEDED an update! So happy reading buds and fans!

 

Brussel Ball Request Day!!!!

August 14th 2007 9:33 am
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OH! A holiday JUST for Catster!!! I LOVE these!!! My main pic is TOTALLY getting changed for the day... Please Catster HQ?!

So so so, my buddy Arnold P., invited Moose and Captain and I to be in the Brussel Ball Club!!! And I mean there have been SO MANY new clubs that have activities and do stuff popping up all over Catster... But this Brussel Ball thing kinda fascinates me... I mean, they play soccer with a brussel sprout!!! I haven't tried eating one of those yet, but I'm sure I'll be very very tempted. But just the idea of playing with food, is just so sooooo FELINE! Makes me proud to be a Catster!

Play on Brussel Ballers!!!

 

Felt Kitten vs. SPARKMAN!

August 10th 2007 7:34 am
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I tried playing with that new kitten that showed up, and you know it's tail is just weak! I went to give it a playful nibble and bit it clean off. It tasted like Captain Morgan or Moose fur, so I purred and started chewing on it like bubble gum. Mom, the usual fun breaker, dove down my mouth with her fingers to pull globs of fur kitten tail out. Then she did something weird, she brushed us all with the zoom groom and made it a new tail!

Since she says we can't be trusted around the fur ball felt kitten, she put it out to commune with nature in the garden... Now when she gets out that zoom groom and tries to brush us, we all look around at each other... Is another fur ball felt kitten going to show up?! This last one came after a longer brushing session... Mom's lost her marbles. That's the only explanation.

 

My Feet...

August 8th 2007 7:40 am
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My feet take so much licking. I think I clean my feet more than any other part of my body. In fact, I don't know how the heck anyone keeps their feet clean! I mean, is THAT why the humans wear shoes? And why don't they lick their shoes? Or at least their feet? And back to my own feet... How do they get so dirty? I wish my feet were grey like Moosie's. Then maybe the dirt wouldn't show! But come to think of it he too spends a long time licking. Captain seems to get away with mostly just bathing his white parts. Which does include his feet, and I must say they're just glowing with cleanliness... But it really is a chore to lick between all those toes. Glad I'm not a polydactyl! or pterodactyl! Oh, I bet dinosaurs had stinky, dirty feet. Like that t-rex guy who screams and scares me in that movie. Yikes! Oh, and then there's those claws you have to maintain! The front ones are easy, just scratch the bed or chair or Mom's head. But those back ones?! I gotta bite off everyone?! Are you kidding me?! This is just stupid. It takes way too much effort to have clean, nice feet and claws...

Okay, back to my pedicure activities.

 

Trials and Tribulations of a Kitten Brain.

August 7th 2007 8:30 am
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It is hard being a kitten. Life is just still so confusing! I'm almost a year old, when will I start understanding the world and conquering stuff like the Captain?! I guess not today in any case...

My latest befuddlement is the two neighbor kids. You see, they're scary. Small humans are just terrifying! You know they're just freaky weird things that pull tails and shriek randomly. You can NOT trust those things. I always hide and freak out when I see them coming towards me. I really am terrified.

But when I'm in the kitchen window and happen to spy them playing in their yard, I just get so excited! I roll around chirping and calling to them. Theres just something about seeing them out the window that makes me adore them. It's a difficult thing to explain, but it's for all the world like they're some batch of kittens next door and I just really really want to play with them!... I'm totally confused. Are they terrifying or do I love them?!

Hrmm...

This make take a while to think about.
I better go nap.

 

Purrs every kitty!

August 5th 2007 10:04 am
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Thank you thank you thank you! It was great being a diary of the day pic, again! So thank you to every kitty that wrote or sent rosies or even just logged on to read!... I feel so loved! Purrs guys!

and just to let you all know, the fire ants from hell have gone back to hell, or some other kitty's lawn... CLEARLY it was a retreat! Moose and I are victorious! Ha ha!!!

Purrs!

 

Alien Mouse from Mars!

August 2nd 2007 2:25 pm
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My latest adventure begins while the humans were being self-centered and once again, ignoring alien invasion. This time, it was in our OWN KITCHEN! DUH-duh-duh-duhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!

Moose was hanging out in the kitchen for almost two days and nights. That silly Mom of ours thought he was just pouting because Dad was out of the house at work overnight... So she was giving him extra pets and brushing... But little did she know that Moose was really in there as the first line of defense against the Mice from Mars!!! He had one cornered under the fridge. It was a bigger one than the one I previously ate, so I assume it's from an alien planet, like Mars. Really it could be from Saturn, Neptune or Klingon... But "Mice from Mars" just sounds right.

So Moose had it cornered for DAYS! Then he got up to go visit the litter box. Being a sneaky little bugger, the alien invader seized Moose's call of nature to sneak out and find a route to the outdoor freedom of his alien launchpad and ship... But such a weakling from Mars, never planned in it's pea-sized brain for the SPARKMAN, super-goat!!!!

I came out of no where and had it by the throat in a second. It didn't have time for a phaser or light saber, that Mouse from Mars didn't even have time to draw breath, I am so invincible and scary fast!

Captain Morgan came around the corner and was all "Hey! That thar be tha prey of Matie Moose!" And I just arched my back and in proper pirate-in-training-fashion, ran! I ran all the way into the dark bedroom where the humans were sleeping. I sat in my favorite corner by the laundry and Mom's side of the bed and growled a soft, quiet warning growl at the Captain and Moose. I was just letting them know that this Mouse for Mars was MY prey!

I heard movement on the bed, and suddenly Mom was sitting upright squinting around in the dark towards my growl noise... She jumped out of bed, and I RAN to the hallway. I was still growling, so she followed me out there, then into the bathroom. I watched her crouch down and squint at my chin... Then she saw the evil alien dangling from my mouth and just said "Where did you find THAT?!"

I threw it on the ground, realized I'd killed it in my efforts, and proceeded to throw around the dead body in play. The whole time I was just growling my little throat out and when Dad came in wearing gloves, something in my head just snapped in PRIMAL MODE! My growling was a constant stream of low cursing, and my eyes darted around in defense of the alien prey. I lashed out at Dad as he tried to take it. And even kissed a little! MY prey!

He finally did some mesmerizing trick with a hand towel. I was watching it dance in front of my face when I realized I had taken my eyes and teeth off of the alien Mouse from Mars... Dad ran out of the room with his prey, and returned with a stinky spray bottle.

At dinner, we got extra wet cat food. And I heard Mom say "This is for a brave super kitten who caught us all a big fat mouse to eat! Mmmm mmm!" I sure hope more aliens invade!!!

purrrrs

 

NEW POTATO BABIES!!!

July 31st 2007 8:31 am
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TWO new potato babies!!! I am IN HEAVEN! Dad was getting potatoes ready for grilling and was standing with the sack of earthy goodness, making faces at the squishy/old ones. So I just sat there and drooled, and whined at him. Mom peaked around the corner and deemed the potatoes worthy of kitten consumption... and then they gave me TWO POTATOES!!!! Now I may be a ninja and a goat in every other aspect of life, but as a potato parent I am full devotion. I have been bathing and carrying around my little baby potatoes. I even nibbled on them a little... just love bites... Oh! The joys of being a potato Dad!

 
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