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Faster than a speeding mouse, more scary than a musk ox, it's SPARKMAN!

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Blue Bird Rosette!

March 27th 2008 11:38 am
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Ooowww! Moosie may have gotten a kite rosette and a Mystery Meeper, but I got a little blue bird! Thank you whomever you are! Clearly, you love me best. Because blue birds are so much cooler than kites! Ha ha! So hard to be so humble all the time... sigh!

Purrs every kitty!


For the Purr of It...

March 25th 2008 8:53 am
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Hey! Mom's helping everybody else update their diaries with little tidbits today, so why not me, huh?! Lots has happened to me!

Like Mom changed the blanket on my favorite radiator, said I'd chewed too many holes in the last one. The new one's not so fun to chew on. I fell asleep on Dad, nursing his arm. Oh! And and and I went out on the glassed in porch all by myself! And I didn't even get scared when the snow plow came by! I'm brave, Rawr!

We've been going out on the leashes now and then. I'm still the first to run inside. Captain says I'm a big fat scared-y cat; but you and I know that I'm just the only one aware of how dangerous things like noisy trucks, hawks, strangers, and ALIENS are! Ahh! Watch out!

There. See? I had a whole lot to say! Purrs everybody!


Dear Mom...

March 20th 2008 10:50 am
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Dear Mom,

Please let this serve as official notice that I am not dressing up for any more meepin' holidays! I don't see you and Dad dressed in Rabbit Ears for the resurrection and spring and such. So why me?!

There's three cats living in this house right now, and of them I'm the first and usually only one to get the festive dress torture. From now on, when I see cutsie, season paraphernalia being all sewed up and touched up... I'm killing it! Right away! I am going to sink my once-upon-a-time six fanged little teeth into it and tear it to shreds! Ha ha! Rawr!

Let's see you make THAT into a "Happy" Easter pic.!
Hmpf! Dang Human.


ps-- Happy Bloomin' Easter.

************************************************* ****

Memo from desk of Mom--

Sorry Sparkman. Will avoid all season decorating of your noggin in future. Btw, you're a cute widdle tiny stinky winky Easter Bunny!

Because I say so-
Yo Momma


Sparkman: Rambling Onward, Ever Onward!

March 19th 2008 9:16 am
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Alas, alak, and Alaska! No Leprechauns deposited any gold coin-age here... Just the normal pirate gold Captain Morgan keeps around. (Nobody tell him it's plastic, he'd be devastated! And probably he would accuse the teller of looting his horde! Ha ha!)

I DID get a spud card in the mail from Chrissy! I sniffed it, licked it, purred at it. It was all very exciting. It even has googlie eyes! Mom taped it to the wall above my favorite radiator so I can keep purring at it whenever I want to.

And the Grandhumans sent me a big box of what I just know is amazing toys! But my silly humans say "Not till Easter!" So I've been napping on it, making sure no one opens it while I'm asleep. Stupid humans.

I've been keeping an eye on this rabbit that hangs out in the front yard. Captain told me its the Easter Bunny checking if we're being naughty or nice... But I just know he's wrong. I mean, is the Easter Bunny really an arctic hare that lives under our porch?! I think not. This guy looks far too tasty to be the legendary Bunny Man! But he seems to frequent the place below the bird feeders. I can see him from the radiator in the corner... Nothing like a warm seat for window hunting!

Purrs, My Marshmellow Peeps!
Happy Easter Bunnies!


Reminder to All Cats: Don't Eat the Green Ones!

March 13th 2008 7:59 am
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Sparkman here with just a quick note to remind everybody not to eat any little green men this week! I know normally I advocate eating all small invaders, as they may of may not be aliens, swamp monsters, or robots. But this week you have a higher chance of them being these strange Irish things called "Leprechauns."

So here's what you do: Pounce on their hind feet and knock them over so they can't get away. If you must use claws, try not to stick them too far through the clothes, I hear that there just isn't much to these little people!

Then pick them up by the feet in your mouth, and dangle them upside down. If they're taller than you climb a chair or something so they're really dangling in the air.

At first they'll be chanting stuff and trying to zap you with spells, just ignore that and keep dangling.

Eventually when they get around to saying "okay, I'll give you anything you want, just please let me go!" Don't let them go! I mean, you can put them down and stop dangling them, but don't loose your claws just yet.

Now you have to get them to do your bidding. Most of us cats can just telepathically communicate with all living things, but I understand a few can't. Here's where Catster comes in...

You drag the little green guy over to the computer, open the catster "gift bin" and point to various things you want. I suggest the pot of gold. With that, you can buy important things like cat food, litter, puff balls, and light armory.

After they give you the stuff, THEN you can eat them! Or let them go so another kitty down the block can catch them and get stuff too. Either way, just make sure you get stuff from them before you get down with your bad cat self. Rawr!

*************************************************** *************

My buddy Callie sent me a link to this very very useful article. Clearly this person knows more about catching Greenies and retreiving Goldies than me!!! So here it is, a much more informed source... Thanks Callie!


Do Leprechauns Get to Sleep in a Pile of Potatoes?

March 10th 2008 12:55 pm
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Boxie Brown gave my Mom this horrible idea last week, and here it is on my head! A HAT!

I was napping on the couch happily, when along comes my human and sticks this green hat thing on my head! She always does these things when I'm sleeping. It's so sneaky of her! I woke up to the sound and flash of that camera in my cute little face. I was blinking and looking around when I realized that the green hat was there on my noggin. Mom kept clicking away, and I just made horrible faces at her.

She stopped clicking and said, "Wait right there! I have an idea!"

And I just glared at her, "What? You think I'd go out in public like this?!"

She came back in the room with the most beautiful thing; a whole bag of potatoes! I just sat there wide eyed looking at her, afraid to knock off the silly hat for fear I'd miss out on potato time. She started piling them around me, and I was purring then. She picked up the camera and started clicking again. I was so happy!

Is this what life is like for a Leprechaun? Rolling around in a pile of potatoes?! If so, sign me up! Mom left out one small potato for me after the sneak attack photo session... I'm going to lick it and cuddle it and carry it around the house! But most of all, I'm going to use it as a pillow. It's a good life as an orange cat in a green hat! Ha ha!


Lion Cubs, Rawr!

March 8th 2008 8:48 am
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Our local zoo just got 3 lion cubs! They're in quarantine still, but I get to watch them on a lion web cam! It's running from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. (central time). It's so exciting! Mom says they look just like me... I wonder if they're my cousins or something! Oh, purrs! Lion cubs!!!


Happy Feb. 29th Everybody!

February 29th 2008 6:55 am
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Mom said it's Leap Year Day! So I'm jumping and leaping my heart out! Hope you're all the same. (It's hard to type while leaping!)

Purrs and Happy Leaping!!!


Sleep Wool Sucking Sucks!

February 27th 2008 7:36 am
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Boy, did I ever get in trouble last night! And this time, I wasn't even awake! I was just laying there all curled up with Captain Morgan at the bottom of the bed, dreaming about my real Mom, the barn, my litter mates, the horses, and of course nursing!

I woke up to my human Mom saying "SPARKMAN!" and yanking me up in the air! What's more, there was fabric in my mouth. I quickly swallowed it before she could see the evidence! But somehow she knew. She yelled "BAD, Sparky! Don't DO that!" And I let out a weak whimper, "What did I DO?!"

She pitched me off the bed then in punishment. And I was still just bewildered and groggy, not sure what just happened... I followed one of the humans who got up to the bathroom and sat on the carpet whimpering at them. I was so tired, and had just lost my bed!

When I went back to bed a while later, the humans were asleep. I climbed back in beside Captain and then saw it: a giant gnawed hole in the top blanket! Oh, NO! If I start eating the bedding, Mom says I'll get kicked out of the bedroom at night. So I've been trying really hard not to do that!

This morning I had a long whimpering pout to give Mom. And I've been extra loving and sweet. Oh, please don't banish me from the bedroom! I'll try and be a good kitten, honest! Gotta get back to purring at her... bye friends!


Editing Down Our Group List...

February 15th 2008 7:51 am
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Hey kitties!

Mom and I are editing down our list of groups me and my bro.s are in (since we realize that there are very few groups that we visit on a regular basis). So I apologize if you're offended by us leaving your group. We love all of you, but we're just trying to be honest and leave groups to those whole are active in them. Purrs and love to all of you!

--the Sparkman!

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