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Faster than a speeding mouse, more scary than a musk ox, it's SPARKMAN!

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The Saga of the Six Fangs Continues...

January 17th 2007 8:30 am
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Sorry to disappoint my buddies... but the photo is being delayed due to my pure and intense hy-purr-ness!!!! Moose asked if I was training for a Marathon or something... Maybe the john bear grease dog sled race... I'm tougher than any sled dog! At least in Minnesota...

So they tried several times last night to photograph me, apparently. I thought they were just waving a new toy in front of my face. And seeing how it kept flashing at me, I just kept biting at it and attacking fingers. Finally I resorted to chewing on Dad and Mom gave up for the night.

She says the chase to photograph my six fangs is still on, which is good cause I really enjoy chewing on my parents. Mmmmmm, human blood!

--Six Fanged Kitten of Doom!

ps-- I asked Mom and Capt. Morgan to put up the pic. they had of HIS six fangs! He only has four now, but apparently went through a similar freakish phase as a teeny bopper!.. bop... bop... *CHOMP*


the only Five Fanged Kitten of not so scary Doom...

January 19th 2007 6:58 am
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Mom says I should be proud, that most kittens only have four fangs, and that I'm still freakish and cool... But I have just been pouting so far this morning. I mean, "Five Fanged Kitten of Doom" just does not sound so cool. And why the heck are my teeth falling out?! I need those to bite stuff! Like my own tail! and my purple mousie!!! Good thing I let Mom and Dad take this picture of me last night! They did it while I was asleep. I woke up briefly, purred and went back to sleep. So just to let you know, I'm not being tortured.

Back to my story of woe...

I woke up this morning when Dad left for work. I wrestled Captain and Moose all over the bed while Mom tried to sleep a little longer. Clearly, being 30% more vicious than the average feline, I won. So I curled up with the Captain to sleep in the day with Mom. Then the weirdest thing occurred to me... I was MISSING A TOOTH! I let out a most pitiful chirp, and then jumped up to Mom's face. I sat there pawing her nose lightly and crying in the worst tones. She woke up and checked me all over for bad cuts, then my brothers, and then she raised an eyebrow and pried open my mouth... how embarrassing! She then found my missing tooth laying on the bed, where we had been wrestling.

I have just been so humiliated, I just following her around chirping. Mom gave me extra milk, tuna treats, nothing seems to work. I am just sad. She and Captain assured me that I'll forget about being the Six Fanged Kitten of Doom by lunch time... But how can one forget such greatness?!!!


Down to Four, and Still Kicking Purple Mousie's Rump! HA- HA!!

January 21st 2007 10:03 am
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I am down to four fangs again. But Mom tells me that my UPPER adult fangs are starting to grow in, and my upper baby fangs are in NO WAY ready to fall out!!! (I show her how stuck fast they are by viciously and violently holding toys in my mouth and kicking them with my back feet. I am a fireball!!! DIE PURPLE MOUSIE!! Ha ha!!)

So stay tuned, cause I might just be a six fanged wonder AGAIN this week!!! But for now, I'm just my normal super kitten terror hero of the north! Watch out bad guys, cause Sparkman is here to stay!!!


Very Sad News.

January 22nd 2007 7:44 am
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Serious, sad news this morning... One of my little buddies that I recruited for the Sparkles Club has gone to the rainbow bridge too early!

Her name was Sparkles (239127). And she was waiting in to reunite with her Mom in Seattle... It is a very tragic circumstance.

If you'd like to leave her Mom a note, there is a forum "When It's Time to Say Goodbye." She's under the thread "she was the greatest know"

Bye bye my friend!


The Return of Six Fangs of Doom!!!!

January 24th 2007 2:12 pm
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Ah, yes! Just when you thought it was safe to let your dogs walk around outside un-escorted; just when you thought that gallon of cow milk was safe in the fridge; just when you thought your hands were healing from the last kitten assault; just when your tail had been reattached by your local friendly ER doc...


HA HA!!!
This time, it's my UPPER fangs! (look closely at the new pic of me biting my knitted snake toy... those are DOUBLE THE FANGS on top!!!!!!) If only I hadn't lost those others I'd be the 8 fanged kitten... but my mouth's kinda small... better off with just six...



First the Sad News...

January 26th 2007 5:34 am
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Oh! This is just a day to follow around Mom and purr and beg to be cuddled!!! I mean, part of it is that I just got de-wormed and have an upset stomach, part of it is that I lost one of my upper fangs and my mouth is WAY more sore than with those lower guys!... But the big reason I'm so sad today is that my big hero Navin is sick! I mean, he's been sick for a while, but finally got diagnosed with Leukemia!! I sure hope that his vet takes good care of him!!! Poor Capt. Poopy Pants!

and in other rotten news, just when Gordy was starting to feel like himself again; his sister Dutchess is sick now!! My goodness thats a nasty kitten flu they are passing around over there! Captain commanded Gordy to get better and he did... Maybe I'll ask him to command Navin (aka Capt. Poopy Pants; Coug; Mr. Magic Pants) and Gordy (aka Pirate Gordy) to get better!!!


Now the oh so much better news!!!!

January 26th 2007 6:01 am
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I've been asking around whenever I see a likely candidate for my paternity, if he perchance fathered a batch of kittens with my Cat Mom (aka the sainted, beautiful mouser of dreams)... And just when I was starting to think that maybe Human Mom was right and that I was from some other planet that sounds a lot like Planet Krypton... Or that maybe I was an immaculate conception. I mean, Capt. Morgan says his Cat Mom was a real lady and therefore a virgin. Though I'm not sure what that word means...

Anyways, just when I was sitting around confused and biting my own tail in befuddlement, my FATHER stepped forward and admitted that he's my Dad!!!! Now I do have a lot of questions; like why he left us to live in Pennsylvania; what was the first thing he noticed about Cat Mom; how many other siblings do I have and in how many states; is he part of a traveling circus, and is that why he was in town; does he bite and chase his own tail like I do all the time; whats the meaning of life; who'd win in an eating contest Garfeild or Cookie Monster; and of course, chicken or fish???

But really, truly, who needs to ask questions at a time like this?! I have a real DADDY!!!! His name is Andre. And I'm the spitting image of him! So THAT's where I got my good looks!!! He even commands building projects! Check him out, he's sooooo pawsome!!! *sigh* DADDY!

************************************************ *******************
ps-- Mom says I should include the IDs of my friends mentioned in my diaries today... oh, and apparently I was on the "Active" list of the kitty diaries yesterday! (thanks for the tip, Sparkles!) I was very surprised and still don't know what "Active" means... Do you??

Navin R. Johnson-Davis #69281
Gordy #276717
Dutchess #276733

ANDRE #173884
Sparkles #427485


Confessions of a Water Lover....

January 28th 2007 10:18 am
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Hello. I am Sparkman, and I am addicted to chasing drips of water around the bath tub. And not just the bath tub, I also chase them around the shower curtain, the sink, drips off wet humans, splashes from the shower, and even the ones Moose splashes out of the drinking fountain.

I first realized that I might have a problem when I was sitting on the side of the bath tub a few weeks ago, watching Human Dad take a shower. I was so enthralled with watching water splash on the sides that I didn't notice Dad petting me several times with a soaking wet hand! Well, you guessed it; I was humiliated with a wet back and tail for what seemed like days.

But I'm admitting it now, because I think my obsession has taken me too far. I was watching the shower water while Human Mom was in it this morning when I realized that I'd have a better view of the drips from inside the bath tub. Now, like most humans, Human Mom kinda blocks the sun (or should I say WATER) when she's towering over me. So I climbed behind her into the "dripless area" of the tub. I sat there for quite a while, licking off the occasional drip from my fur and purring at all the water splashing around me. It didn't occur to me that I was doing anything weird until Mom called Human Dad over to see me... I dashed out and pretended to have just fallen in. I sat cleverly on the carpet bathing my wet fur, and then I realized it... I am a water addict!!!!

I'll have to go find a support group for this. I mean, cats loving faucets is one thing, cats who drink a lot of water is another, but cats who even go into the shower to watch splashing?! That is just too far. I'm so embarrassed.


Still the FIVE FANGER!!!!!

January 30th 2007 6:32 am
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RAWRRR!!!! I still have more fangs than should be allowed! There is true terror in the hearts of pine cones, corks, yarn balls, and even Mom's shirt buttons!!! The Five Fanged Kitten of Doom still lurks the halls in search of toes and ankles and tails to bite! Look out world! I'm STILL the FIVE FANGER!!!!!!! Ha ha!!!!!


Five Fangs of Fear!!!

January 31st 2007 12:59 pm
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Uh-oh... I just heard Mom talking on the phone with that pretty girl vet I like flirting with. NOW I'm worried! I thought that trip we're planning on Friday was just a flirty, fun date with Ms. Vet... Luke suggested I show her my five fangs... But Mom's all talking about dropping me off, leaving me there!!! And I can't eat before hand?! This is serious. What the heck are they plotting?! And I wonder if I get to bring my purple mousie... how bout the rainbow colored blanket? and the scratching post? The ball in track?!! So scared!

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