Paws OFF!

Karma Llasa joined Catster with the intention of cataloging her memoirs before she died, but sadly she didn't make it. She left for Rainbow Bridge March 30th, 2006. Her staff is continuing to tell her stories from the many purrs and memories she left behind...

It was the time of year I always looked forward to. The nights got longer, the sun didn't shine as long, a chill came on the air and my Mommy brought a fir tree inside. Ah yes, the time of year called "Christmas".

I love trees. Always have. But this once a year indoor tree is special. I've heard some kitties think these trees are for climbing or messing with but that's not what I love about them. I don't completely understand it, but there's something special about the tree. It's like there's this special kind of love and light involved; something to be revered and marvelled at.

If there wasn't, humans wouldn't take such great care in putting on twinkly lights, colored ornaments and a special velvet rug for me to lay on underneath it. It's so pretty I wouldn't dream of messing with it. Besides I look gooood underneath it with the lights sparkling on my fur and my blue eyes shining like the ornaments adorning the tree.

Of course there was one Christmas when I was an impetuous young cat. I wanted to go outside and play but Mommy didn't have time to take me. I got mad, walked to the tree and smacked one of the dangling balls off the tree and clear across the room. I felt bad about it and vowed never to hurt the tree again.

When Nikki moved in with us she had never seen a Christmas tree. I wasn't sure how she was going to take to it. We both watched from across the room as our humans brought in the tree and put on the lights and colored things. When it was all done Nikki went to the tree to check it out.

Sure enough Nikki lifted a paw and aimed for one of the dangling balls and just as she was about to make contact I lept at her from across the room and cuffed her upside the head. "NO!" I hissed. "Leave the tree alone!"

For the rest of the night I stood guard and growled a warning anytime it looked like Nikki was even thinking of playing with the tree. And I have to hand it to her, with the exception of a few things being knocked off the tree by one of our tails as we walked by...she never once violated the tree.

Mommy involves me in the tree decorating and I get to help put up the ones that have my picture on them. It's always a time to reflect on our years together.

And if that's not worth respect and reverence, then I just don't know what is.

Next, The Battle for the Bedroom

A New Home, A New Beginning

Karma Llasa joined Catster with the intention of cataloging her memoirs before she died, but sadly she didn't make it. She left for Rainbow Bridge March 30th, 2006. Her staff is continuing to tell her stories from the many purrs and memories she left behind...

Moving day had finally arrived. Now moving day was never a favorite affair of mine since the process involved total upheaval of my world, but I usually managed to deal with it. On this move, I think I was probably the calmest of everyone involved.

Nikki was flipping out in her cat carrier. Mommy was apprehensive that she was making the right choice. She confided in me that this would not be like when The Freak was living with us and she expected The Bearded One to make a comittment to be a family. He seemed a little anxious too. The other human helpers were busy moving boxes and furrniture.

When all our things were moved into the new place we were allowed to come out of our safe places and explore. The new place was nice. And big! It had a large porch and smelled new.

But something else was going on.

All I saw was The Bearded One give Mommy a round piece of gold with a shiny stone. It looked small, but it must have been really heavy because when Mommy took it in her hand she fell to her knees and started crying.

The Bearded One had tears on his face too and as he helped Mommy back to her feet he said "Well, is that a yes or no?" to which she replied "YES!" and hugged him. All the moving helpers had happy looks on their faces.

The Bearded One was going to become "Daddy" and with Nikki in the house it meant we would become a real family! Wedding plans began immediately and several months later, around my 10th birthday, Mommy became a bride.

That made me the big sister, a job that had great responsibilities especially since Nikki needed much breaking in.

Next: Our first official family Christmas means Nikki needs a lesson!

So Much For Being An Only Child...

Karma Llasa joined Catster with the intention of cataloging her memoirs before she died, but sadly she didn't make it. She left for Rainbow Bridge March 30th, 2006. Her staff is continuing to tell her stories from the many purrs and memories she left behind...


It was October of 1995 when The Bearded One moved in with Nikki.

I think everyone was nervous about how it would go and how everyone would get along. At least there was a plan.

Our little apartment was crammed full of boxes and extra furniture, which was kinda fun because it was like a kitty cat amusement park with lots of things to climb on. We would shortly be moving to a newer, much bigger place.

And Nikki and I were to be gradually and slowly introduced to one another.

The last of the boxes had been brought into our place when I spied a familiar sight: a cat carrier! The creature inside was mewing and taken quickly to the back room and the door closed. A while later The Bearded One emerged and slid the door shut behind him.

Now it's important to note that the door to this room was the kind that you slide shut, not the kind that swing shut. This is an important detail to remember.

Anyway, so Mommy and The Bearded One sat down and watched me as I sniffed at the door. It was open a crack, just enough for me to see that on the other side was a green eyed grey kitty. That was no surprise, but her paw coming out from under the door was!

I puffed and hissed! HISS HISS HISS!!!!!!!!!!!

I eventually settled down and Mommy felt things were going fairly well. So she and The Bearded One left to get dinner.

Now it's hard to describe exactly what happened next, but that kitty decided she didn't want to be in that room anymore. After all, it wasn't her normal place. So she got her paw under the door and started jiggling it. It moved a little. Then she wedged her paw into the opening on the side and jiggled it some more.

Soon she was able to wedge a shoulder in the gap and make the opening larger. Next thing I knew she was sticking her whole face through and then the door slid aside enough for her to walk out into the living room.

Well, hello Nikki.

We talked. We argued. We negotiated territory. We laughed at our silly humans. We also made a pact not to ever disclose the exact nature of our conversations that night. She knows what was said.

When Mommy and the Bearded One returned the first thing they saw was a grey streak as Nikki ran to hide behind a box. I was sitting in the middle of the room. Mommy freaked out when she realized we'd been alone with one another and she feared the worst.

I was picked up and closely examined for battle wounds. The Bearded One picked up Nikki and did the same but we were both fine.

They figured if we'd introduced ourselves and hadn't killed or maimed one another that they might as well leave us be. Nikki was put into her room at night and when we'd be alone but she was so good at escaping that they finally gave up.

I won't kid you, there was an awful lot of hissing and swatting going on but we both had a sense that it wouldn't change things. The best we could do was negotiate territory. We were both devoted to our humans and our humans appeared devoted to us and to each other. Most importantly we had one other thing in common.

None of us would ever be "lonely onlies" ever again.

Next: Mommy hits her knees and cries when we get to our new home!

The Bearded One Arrives

Karma Llasa joined Catster with the intention of cataloging her memoirs before she died, but sadly she didn't make it. She left for Rainbow Bridge March 30th, 2006. Her staff is continuing to tell her stories from the many purrs and memories she left behind...


I sat across the room and glared at him and his bearded face. When he came close I hissed at him. I made it very clear from the beginning I wasn't going to put up with any shenanigans like The Freak sometimes pulled.

The Bearded One and I took a long time to settle into a harmonious relationship but I'll tell you why: I'm protective. Jealous too perhaps, but I think Mommy and I had just gotten to a point in our lives where we weren't going to mess around with losers anymore.

When he started hanging around he would show up before Mommy got back from making kitty cat food money. He'd sit in the courtyard and wait patiently for her to come home. That was a good sign. Patience.

When he was inside he gave me a lot of space and was kind. Also a good sign. Respect.

Another time he came over and helped Mommy clean. He even removed stinky things from the cold box. A sign of sacrifice.

And then one night he put his face up to hers for a human kiss. Ah yes. The sign of affection. She was all atwitter the whole next day.

And neither of them ever made me feel like a third wheel. That was the most important sign of all. A family was forming. This was a huge improvement over The Freak.

As the fall of my 9th year approached they began talking about living in the same place. Then one day Mommy sat me down and we had a talk. Seems like there was something about The Bearded One I didn't know.

He had a cat of his own!

Up to this point I had lived with two cats, not counting my litter mate brothers. One was an insane blue point siamese that we had to give away, the other belonged to The Freak and ran away to escape his oddness. Neither of those feline relationships worked out very well. So Mommy sat me down:

"Karma, you've been an only child almost your entire life but that's about to change. You're going to be sharing a new home soon with a new kitty named Nikki. I know you're not going to like it, but it's very important to me that you try and get along because Nikki is not going to go away. No kitty will ever replace you as my baby girl, but I love Nikki too so it's important to me that you try very hard. You don't have to like her, but you have to learn to live with her."

I just kinda stared at her. I didn't know what to say. But soon the boxes started filling up one of our rooms. Then furniture. And then....

Nikki.

Next: I come face to face with the new cat.

Karma Llasa is a National Radio Star!

Karma Llasa joined Catster with the intention of cataloging her memoirs before she died, but sadly she didn't make it. She left for Rainbow Bridge March 30th, 2006. Her staff is continuing to tell her stories from the many purrs and memories she left behind...

For the last 15 years or so I've been helping Mommy with her job of making kitty cat food money by giving her stuff to talk about on her radio show.

My Mommy is what humans call a "DJ".

In 1992 Mommy was hired to talk over something called the Real Country radio network. When we lived in New Mexico she only talked on one radio station, but with Real Country she's heard on radio stations from Bakersfield California...to Texas and Minnesota...all the way to Georgia and Binghampton, NY. People in literally hundreds of towns and cities around the country have heard stories about me.

When she got the job she came home and hugged me and laughed and cried all at the same time because it meant our lives were about to take a huge turn for the better. I liked it because she didn't have to be gone so much.

As a radio "purrsonality" she said she had to talk about things going on in her life so that meant I had to get busy and do cute and funny things so she could talk about them. I thought it might make her seem like one of those crazy cat ladies but she said humans love to talk about their animal friends. Turns out she was right!

Sure, there have been a few grumpy people over the years who have complained about my antics but those were perennial cat haters anyway who were best ignored. She's had far more people call and ask for MORE stories!

Once, when I was sick I even had country singer Clint Black send "get well" wishes.

I've even gotten fan mail! And one gentleman made an etched glass mirror with my likeness. How about that for cool? And when the internet came along people were begging for Mommy to post pictures of me. I'll bet some of my fans are reading this diary right now!

Probably my best known work on the radio was when I "sang" with the Jingle Cats on a special holiday recording Mommy plays on her show every year. She says she'll play it even after I'm gone. And I bet there won't be a dry eye in the house when she does.

So no matter where you are, if you ever hear a radio station calling themselves "Real Country" and the DJ is talking about her cats it's probably my Mommy.

(Next: The "Bearded One" enters our lives...)

Mother Nature and Her Lessons

Karma Llasa joined Catster with the intention of cataloging her memoirs before she died, but sadly she didn't make it. She left for Rainbow Bridge March 30th, 2006. Her staff is continuing to tell her stories from the many purrs and memories she left behind...

In the last chapter I told of how Mommy and I would hunt Flying Chicken Nuggets together. But for as much fun as we had it wasn't a practical arrangment for larger game. Humans stink and lack the finesse of stalking necessary to sneak up on prey.

Mommy got a new job that paid more kitty cat food money so we moved into a larger apartment with a little courtyard patio. This meant I could go outside unaccompanied for short periods of time.

One afternoon Mommy was in the food room and left the screen door unlatched so I was able to slip into the courtyard. It was a wonderful day. The sun had warmed the concrete so I dropped and rolled around on it to get rid of some of the house stink. Then I decided to sniff the Oleanders which is when opportunity literally flew in. A bird landed about 6 yards from me!

Looking back I'm amazed at how I instinctively knew what to do. I may have spent the last 8 years as a common housecat but Momma Nature had me hardwired for the task at hand. First, I froze. Then I crouched low and ever so slowly moved into position. Then it happened...

I pounced! In one instant I pounced, grabbed it's neck in my mouth and snapped it. I stood there for a moment to take in what I'd done and was so shocked and thrilled that I just had to share it with my faithful hunting partner.

So into the house I went with my bird.

Mommy recoiled when she saw it in my mouth. When I dropped it to the carpet, tiny feathers blew up from it's limp body and drifted back down in slow motion. "Karma Llasa you got yourself a bird!" said Mommy. She seemed pleased so I showboated a little and played with the bird, scattering more feathers about. That's when Mommy went back to the food room and came back with a little dish of tuna.

Talk about bait and switch.

While I was distracted with the tuna, Mommy removed the bird from the house and threw it away. THREW IT AWAY!!! I was so pissed.

But it taught me a very important lesson. Eat what you hunt. It was not a mistake I would make ever again.

Next time, Karma Llasa becomes a nationally known feline!

Flying Chicken Nuggets

Karma Llasa joined Catster with the intention of cataloging her memoirs before she died, but sadly she didn't make it. She left for Rainbow Bridge March 30th, 2006. Her staff is continuing to tell her stories from the many purrs and memories she left behind...

It was the summer of my 6th year and life was pretty good. Mommy was happy and we were living on our own and enjoying every minute of it. We were quite the team.

Mommy would come home late from making kitty cat food money. Since it was cooler and quieter at that time of day I'd go outside and roam in the lush jungle like gardens outside my apartment. I would sniff the world and roll on the ground and explore all the plants and not have to worry about other people or animals. Mommy was my sentinel as I played.

On one excursion I was startled by a winged creature flying up in front of me. It made this odd noise so I chased it down, played with it for a while and then decided to finish it off.

But best of all, it tasted like chicken!

That's when I looked around and saw there were dozens of these things! Mommy said they were called "Cicadas" but I think they should have been called Flying Chicken Nuggets because that's what they were. Tasty little flying morsels. Some were down around my level, but many more of them were hovering around the lights on the walls just out of my reach.

I looked at Mommy pitifully. How was I going to get to those other Flying Chicken Nuggets?

Well, I'll tell you how. She came and picked me up. She held my butt and put my front paws on the wall where the Flying Chicken Nuggets were. I would move my paws in the direction of where I wanted to hunt a Nugget and she'd move my bottom half. Once I got one of my big paws on it and knocked it to the ground, she'd drop me so I could finish the job. I was amused at the buzzing sound they made as I held them in my mouth. Sometimes I would just let it buzz for a while until I closed my jaws and mercilessly ended it's miserable life. When I was done and spotted another high up on the wall, she'd boost me up so I could get it. All I had to do was look at it, look at Mommy to make eye contact and then look back at the Nugget to signal it was time to reload.

Mommy and I hunted Flying Chicken Nuggets like this most of the summer. Like I said, we'd become quite a team.

But there was bigger prey in my future, and a bigger apartment too!

Next, another new home and my first big kill!

That's some Christmas present!

Karma Llasa joined Catster with the intention of cataloging her memoirs before she died, but sadly she didn't make it. She left for Rainbow Bridge March 30th, 2006. Her staff is continuing to tell her stories from the many purrs and memories she left behind...

When we left New Mexico for Arizona life was pretty shook up. It wasn't easy but me and Mommy stuck it out and actually grew closer. We moved to yet another apartment home but it was on the ground and there were trees and things to sniff.

And even better, The Freak left for good so for the first time in almost 2 years it was just me and Mommy again.

This apartment was pretty small though so Mommy decided that if she couldn't expand the floor space for me, the least she could do was expand my space vertically.

So one day she locked me in the bedroom and as I sat indignant on the bed wondering what in the world she was doing, she hauled in two incredible surprises: my first Christmas tree in over a year AND an enormous 7 foot tall carpeted cat tree!

It had 4 legs to scratch my nails on. A house to hide in. A side perch and another long post to do my nails on. It also had a big carpeted bed on the very top that was just purrrfect to sleep in! I could hardly believe it. This thing cost more than any of the furniture Mommy herself used. And she had gotten it just for me!

That cat tree is about 15 years old now. The legs are pretty well shredded and there's a ton of my fur on it. If you peaked into the bed on top you'd find a good inch of soft himalayan fur lining it. In my older age I don't scamper up there as often, in fact, I can't remember the last time I did but it's one of my most cherished posessions.

Well, after Mommy, of course....

Next time, "Hunting for Flying Chicken Nuggets"!

Karma's Big Day Out

Karma Llasa joined Catster with the intention of cataloging her memoirs before she died, but sadly she didn't make it. She left for Rainbow Bridge March 30th, 2006. Her staff is continuing to tell her stories from the many purrs and memories she left behind...

I had moved to Arizona with Mommy and The Freak. I had to stay in the bedroom of Tequila Girl's house for a few weeks but eventually we got into our own place.

It was my first time living in an apartment and it was quite a bit different from when I lived in a house. We lived upstairs. But the biggest change was I didn't get to go out very often. Mommy took me out on a leash but all I could really do was sniff a little.

I missed my climbing tree and freedom of the back yard.

Then one morning I found myself outside alone. Mommy had already left to make kitty cat food money and The Freak was still at home. He was rushing around to leave and left the door open and I couldn't resist but slip outside to sniff the morning air. I don't know if he saw me or not but the next thing I knew the door was closed and it was the beginning of a very unusual day.

The day I was on my own.

I explored the neighborhood, hid from strangers, napped under bushes, got grease on my head from going underneath a car and watched people come home to their doors. There were birds and lizards and other critters to chase. I never felt so cat-like.

Then the sun went down. I was getting thirsty and hungry. And then the neighborhood grew quiet as the humans all went to bed. Every so often I'd go back to where our door was but it was closed. So I'd go back down the stairs and explore some more.

I sure was getting hungry though. I began to grow concerned because the door had been closed for so long. Where was Mommy? I had enjoyed my day but now I needed my comfortable places to sleep, my food, fresh water and Mommy.

The neighborhood had been quiet for a long time. I went back up the stairs again to see if maybe Mommy was back and this time not only did I see a light from the doorway, but I heard something too. It was Mommy. She was crying very hard and she sounded very upset.

I peaked my head in the door to see if it was safe to go inside. I stood there for a moment as Mommy's soul uttered the most broken hearted cry I'd ever seen. As I tried to understand what was happening she glanced over and saw me.

"Karma Llasa!!!!!" she cried as she ran to me, scooped me up in her arms and shook with sobs. She was crying so hard she couldn't breathe. And she was soaking my fur with her tears. I stopped counting her kisses at a hundred.

In human terms I had been on my own for 18 hours. When Mommy came home she instantly knew I wasn't there. The Freak wasn't home either. She had no idea what had happened to me and thought that after all we'd been through that I was gone forever.

The outside world is a scary place for the domestic cat. All kinds of things could have happened to me but on this day I got lucky. My instincts kept me safe and my love for the good life kept me coming home to Mommy.

I never had another adventure like that again. Sometimes I dream of that day and all the little things I did. But when I remember how frightened Mommy was I realize that the best place for me is right by her side.

Don't Bite the Wrist That Feeds You.

Karma Llasa joined Catster with the intention of cataloging her memoirs before she died, but sadly she didn't make it. She left for Rainbow Bridge March 30th, 2006. Her staff is continuing to tell her stories from the many purrs and memories she left behind...

The place we had moved to was called Arizona.

Gone was the big house and the yard with trees to climb. For now, I was confined to a bedroom in a house full of other animals because Mommy didn't want me associating with them. Frankly, I wasn't too keen on it either. The cats whispered mean things to me under the door and there was a huge dog on the other side too.

Mommy still felt bad about me having to stay in this small room. So she brought out my old collar and tied a long piece rope to it and took me out to stretch my legs and smell my new city in the evenings. It wasn't much freedom, but it was something.

One night I spied one of the cats who was talking smack under the door and I bounded over to have a chat about it. Mommy ran after me yelling to stop. This other cat, this "Chief Cat" as she thought, screeched at me something about "her territory". I puffed my long fur and swung one of my big paws at her disrespectful bedraggled face.

Then I was scooped up from behind. I couldn't see who had me. They'd put my four paws in a human hand lock and I was being carried to the house.

The front door of the house the squeaky screen door flew open and the man of the house walked out. With my senses on high alert and my claws incompacitated the noise sent me over the edge and I used the only weapon I had left.

I sank my teeth deep into the wrist of the person holding me.

The man yelled "Oh my God! I'd KILL that cat!" And the person holding me calmly said "Bob, please open the door."

Uh oh. The person holding me was Mommy.

The man continued ranting and Mommy, who was still holding me firmly continued to very calmly say "Bob, please open the door and let me and Karma in".

When I got to the bedroom and she put me on the bed which I promptly hid under and she left. I felt really bad. I mean, I used to play bite and nip her all the time but this was a full on defensive sink your teeth all the way in kind of bite.

Mommy came back to the bedroom and I crawled out from under the bed to plead my case. But she picked me up and cuddled me and told me it was okay and that she understood I'd bitten her because I was frightened. I didn't have to say a thing...she just knew.

To this day Mommy still points out the two little scars on her wrist from when I bit her. They're a reminder of a rocky time in both our lives when we both felt a little lost, a lot scared and uncertain of what the future would bring. We didn't stay in that house for long after that....and just like the scars the bad times eventually faded.

But not before I gave Mommy one more incredibly big scare.

Next, "Karma's Big Adventure"