October 28, 2009 - Legato's Song is Silent.

One of my favorite songs from the musical "Cats" is the one about how cats contemplate their secret name, known only to them and not shared with their pet humans. I like to think that Legato shared that name with my sister who encouraged me to adopt him in 2004, although for no known reason he never seemed to like her after that first day. I had been struggling to decide on a name for him, knowing only that the name his rescue group gave him, "Snoball," was definitely not the right one for him.

When, about two weeks after adopting him, I told my sister how this still-nameless cat loved to sit on my lap and purr, she suggested "Legato," which she explained is an Italian word used by classical musical composers to indicate a "calm and peaceful interlude," and also sounds like the Spanish, "el Gato," which means "cat." So, "Snoball" became Legato L. Gato - the calm and peaceful singing cat.

I can't help but think that "Legato" was his secret name, the one usually cats reserve for themselves, and that for whatever reason, he loved us enough to honor us by sharing it with us. (Of 203,875 cats on Catster right now, he's the only one with that name.) Maybe he knew that no matter how many miles he traveled with me (300 miles, 3 times a month, for 2 years, then 110 miles, 3 times a month, for 3 years, plus one business trip - all by car), he had his forever home the day I took him home for the first time.

I spoke with the vet yesterday morning, and both vets in the practice felt that only the IV fluids were keeping Legato alive. When I went to visit him, I agreed. Both vets felt that the only possible options were either a bone marrow aspiration, which would not have shown anything which could be treated and which would have been horribly painful for Legato, or putting him to sleep.

At my request, since I knew I would not be able to drive home safely after Legato died, they agreed to keep him comfortable until October 29th, but Dad was able to come out and go with me back to the vet's.

Legato was put to sleep on the afternoon of October 28, 2009, because of a blood disorder. The vets were able to regulate his sugar, but he was showing no sign of improvement and no interest in his environment. The vet used the term "blood dysplasia."

Now, I go between completely numb and knife-like sadness, but I know I did everything I could, and I know I did the right thing by letting Legato go.

Legato's song is silent now.

Waiting, Waiting, and More Waiting

Two emergency calls to the vet yesterday (Oct. 25th) convinced me not to have Legato put to sleep. She said he might be more comfortable if I held food and water for several hours, then reintroduced it slowly. I did, and he's walking more, but definitely not steadily.

Legato woke me at 4:50am when he was vomiting again - he makes this horrible meow when he does - but has seemed mostly comfortable since then. He's been able to keep down liquids, and after I gave him two small amounts of water about 40 minutes apart, began drinking on his own.

The vet called this morning - she's waiting on the lab results. She said yesterday that she's hoping that the 8% "unidentified cells" in his blood count will be something treatable.

Legato's figured out that I will carry him if he feels too tired to walk. He has a different meow from the vomiting one, and usually walks as far as he feels like, then points his head in the direction he wants me to take him.

For now, I guess, it's back to more waiting.

The vet called back

The vet called back and we think Legato may have an ulcer in his stomach. He's resting comfortably, and I'm cooking chicken and rice for him. He only vomited once today, so I'm still hoping we can get through until tomorrow afternoon.

Update - Sad

Legato vomited something I've never seen this morning, and he's restless. If it gets any worse, I'll take him to an animal ER and have him put to sleep today. Otherwise, I'm 99% sure I'll have him put to sleep tomorrow, unless the bloodwork comes back with something easy and quick to cure and he can be kept comfortable long enough for the cure to work.

Very bad news

On Oct. 9th, Legato went to the vet's because of an incident the night before where he seemed to forget how to stand up in the middle of standing up. Blood tests showed a high white count, and he was started on injections of antibiotics. Legato has a history of coughing up pills, and it was life and death that he get the antibiotics in him.

At a follow-up a week later, on Oct. 16th, his white cell count remained high and the lab flagged it for review by their pathologist. The vet said the lab was suspecting cancer, namely Leukemia (like humans get, not the Feline Leukemia Virus, for which Legato has always tested negative). The vet and I were hoping it was a simple infection, because for the first time since June, Legato didn't loose weight - he gained 4.5 ounces in a week.

The pathologist reviewed the results, and on Oct. 19th the vet was told, and then told me, Legato does not have cancer. The vet and I thought Legato was out of the woods.

Yesterday, Oct. 23rd, I had Legato back at the vet's for a follow-up. He had seemed to be doing a little worse since Wednesday night (Oct. 21st), At yesterday's check-up, Legato had lost a pound. The vet drew more blood for another complete blood count (CBC) (4th in 5 weeks).

Last night Legato had a very, very rough night. He couldn't seem to get comfortable. I called the vet first thing this morning, and she saw him. The lab had alerted her that Legato's CBC from yesterday has been flagged for review by a pathologist, since 8% of his blood consists of "Unidentified Cells." We made the decision that if we couldn't get Legato comfortable, I'd put him to sleep.

Legato perked up after IV fluids, a shot of a different antibiotic, and dexamethasone. He's home now, and eating and drinking a ton. Dexamethasone is a steroid and probably caused Legato's diabetes in the first place. Steroids are contraindicated in diabetic cats, but like the vet said, we had no choice.

Legato cannot survive on a regular routine of steroids. Nor is it fair to him to keep him alive if he is going to suffer like he did last night. The vet has promised to call me Monday morning with the pathologist's findings, but unless there's another miracle, I'll be putting him to sleep next week.

I think my vet's confused - or maybe I am - I'm too confused to tell!

Three years ago, when I first met my current vet, she said I had a skin infection. Nothing confusing there (even my pet human knew I did), except that according to the vet, my skin infection was one found only in dogs who have diabetes due to Cushing's Disease. As I've proven to my vet, I'm not a dog, and I don't think I have Cushing's Disease.

Well, yesterday the same vet was telling my pet human that my white blood cell count on October 9, 2009, was very, very, very high - so high she usually performs an emergency spay because cats with that high of a white cell count usually have an infected uterus!

So, in 2006 she says I have something only dogs get, and yesterday she said my lab results are more like a girl's. Now, the only lab I ever met had 4 legs, was named "Max," and tried to bite me, so maybe there are smarter labs out there, but for now, I think my vet should trade her lab for something smarter, like a Siamese. Maybe then I'd get passing test scores!

My Very Good Day

My pet says I'm not out of the woods, but I can tell you I'm eating more than I have since June, which is good. My pet says I've lost about 4 pounds since then and need to regain at least 1.5 pounds. I think my blood sugar is a little high, though.

Last night, I played with my laser pointer for the first time since June, too. I played for about 2 minutes. I wanted to play longer, but my pet was worried since I haven't run or jumped since early July, and the vet told her last week my heart is too big. (I always knew I'm a big-hearted cat!) Later last night, while my pet was sleeping, I discovered a tennis shoe with a lace! Oh, boy! Legatos LOVE shoelaces and strings even more than they hate vets! I played and played and played. My pet worried when she woke up this morning that maybe I broke some of her toys, but I was careful and didn't break anything. Not even the shoelace!

The only thing I did wrong was I got scared last night. My pet was brushing her teeth and saw me get scared. I couldn't tell her what I was scared of, and when she called my vet this morning to tell her how I'm doing, the tech said maybe I jumped back because I felt pain. I'm not sure what to tell my pet.

Well, now it's time for dinner, then my antibiotic and tummy med, then a catnap before bedtime!

A Little Bit of Hope

My pet human says my vet called her yesterday morning, even though the vet wasn't working. The vet said I have some sort of infection an they are giving me 2 shots of antibiotics a day to help me get better. My pet human says it's another "Hail, Mary! Pass." My pet's favorite team is the Cleveland Browns, and I really hope my vet's better at Hail, Mary passes than they are.

Spent the day at the Vet's

My pet human has been very worried about me. In June, my diabetes came out of remission. Then I caught a cold. Then my allergies got worse. Last night, I forgot for a few minutes how to stand up.

Today, I was a very good cat for a very vet-ish vet. The vet took blood from me twice, then took x-rays. I had to stay at the vet's for about 3 hours. The vet and my human spoke at the beginning, and the vet decided to give me my own exam room - not a cage, but a whole room. It was nice to be able to hide under the chair. Too bad the vet found me!

Well, just before my human and I came home - she stayed at the vet's with me most of the time - the vet told her that I have "progressive heart failure." I don't know what that means. The vet and my human think that someone made a mistake when they told my human I was born in 2001. They think I'm older.

I know I feel like a very old cat right now. I'm sleeping more and eating less. My laser pointer isn't all that interesting anymore. My pet human is crying a lot too, especially since last night.

Tomorrow, the vet will call with the blood test results from today. My pet human has said she and the vet will do the best they can for me, but my vet thinks I may be die soon.

I Tricked The Vet!

Okay, so my silly human has insisted on taking me to the vet several times a week lately, and every time, the vet either collects more blood - (a really weird collection if you ask me. Couldn't he just collect postcards like my pet does?) or gives me a shot of something.

Well, yesterday, the vet had his partner examine me. She's nice, too, but she seems to be starting her own blood collection (note to her - Collect coins. At least you can buy some catnip that way!) She thought my ears looked yellow, and so she collected more blood. (If you don't like coins, Dr. - what about stamps? Bottle caps? )

Well, then I wouldn't go back in my crate to go home. That scared my pet human, and worried the vet, since usually I spend my time there trying to get back in my crate. Well, you'd think someone who had been to vet school would know when a cat has to use a litterbox. My pet got me into my crate, but the ride home was too long and I couldn't wait. I hate pooping in my crate!