A-paw-logies

Paw-ly

Yes, it's been some time since I last left a message here. My brother and sisters and I are still alive and well, and still terrorizing the humans.

I'm now a lot bigger! I'm the biggest of all four, but I freely admit to being a bit of scaredy-cat. When the female human's parents visited a few days ago - I hid in the laundry. I can't put my paw on it, but there's just something about humans that bothers me. When others visit, particularly those miniature furless screaming humans, all they want to is to chase me and pull my tail! I don't need that! It's bad enough when Fluff hisses and spits at me if I climb her carpeted-castle, but sometimes the big humans want to throw me from the kitchen bench.

My brother Trouble is settling down more often. He used to very paranoid, chasing his own tail and jumping at the site of his shadow! Ok, it was funny - but he finally has his own little box next to the heater. He sure looks cute rolled up in a ball all day, his head resting on the end of his tail. Happy at last. He's not as black as me, but has a brown-tinge to his fur. I'd almost admire it -- but I look like a panther!

Sister Paws, oh sister! If there was ever a more feisty sister to have, I wouldn't want it! From one moment to the next, she has mood swings that beat Paris Hilton paws-down! Paws will wake up in a heart-beat and proceed to lick my neck. Weird. Ok, so I like the preening - but she likes to BITE! And then she'll wail, not just meow like a normal cat, but wail while she is biting me. The humans don't understand it either. But we all tolerate it. I reckon she's got brain-problems.

And her, the queen b1tch, Fluff.
She still lives. Dammit. She is sooooo annoying. As I send the thoughts to the human-brain to type this out, Fluff sat down in front of me. Think that's nothing. I'm sitting in front of the gloriously warm heater. She's managed to block my heat!! She does this all the time. Thankfully the humans have worked out her game - and she is scolded for this. Hehe.

Well, the male human is home sick, sicker than a dog (which proves how sick he is!!). He keeps snorting and coughing and leaving disgusting bits of tissue paper around his desk. And they say we are messy!! So I'm sitting waaay over here, as far as possible without losing the heat. While he recovers from this ghastly 'flu', I'm going back to sleep.

Oh, I've developed a very very bad habit. I ... I .... pee in the kitchen. I don't mean to. It's just.. just that, well - my smaller sister picks on me. I get nervous. I go where I can. The humans are NOT happy. They've tried various ways to convince me not to do it. And I want to be good. But they know I can't help myself!
Can you help me? Do you know of anything they can do to convince me not to PEE on the lino' ?

END TRANSMISSION. {Hehe. That human. He thinks he types this without me, but I have to send the message to his brain.}