I am the Queen

In this house and yard, I rule. I'm the senior female and it's my job to tell the others what is and isn't acceptable. My brother Lee-Roy ignores me for the most part, so if he goes by I'll smack him on his behind to remind him who his Queen is.

Little Miss Cactus would like to be Queen, but she accepts her status of Princess for now. She'll come to me with the proper lowered head and I'll wash her forehead before I cuff her to remind her who is senior. She's a good girl, really. Not nearly as beautiful as I am with my long fluffy fur. The only place she is allowed to rule is in the bedroom. She has claimed it as her territory, inheriting her position on the bed from my old love, Boo. I can't climb up there anymore anyway, so the bed is hers.

I've got mommy trained to give me whipped cream in the morning. I won't eat it if it's the cheap stuff. It has to be pure high-quality whipped cream. I've also got her trained to brush me every day. I keep telling her to leave my legs alone because they hurt, but she insists on brushing them a little bit until I smack her with my claws or pinch her with my teeth. I know she understands, she's just stubborn.

I want her to be my cushion when I'm sleeping. She keeps getting up to do stuff. Why don't humans just sit down and relax? And then there's the laptop computer she got last year! Grrr. Her lap used to be MINE. Now I have to share it with that thing. The warm air that comes out of it feels good, though.

Sometimes mommy takes me in the car to a funny place that doesn't smell like vet. The man uses a clicking thing that hurts my back and neck. She says he's a kiro.. chiro.. something. I have to admit I feel better when we get home. It doesn't hurt to walk as much.

I know Lee-Roy and Cactus want to get that rat. I think he's cute. When I'm sleeping on mommy's computer room chair in the afternoons, he comes out to visit with me. He's a nice little guy. We've bumped noses before.

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