Uno Happily Irrepressible!

A Castle Out of Control

November 26th 2013 11:19 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 2 people already have ]

Zoom! Zoom! Zooom! and occasionally thud, crash, kaboom!

Through the house with the speed of light a trio of tiny tornadoes streak, jumping, bouncing, pivoting on a dime to reverse direction, only to fly through the house in the opposite direction. Quite often they manage to knock over the trash can or jump up on something that's not solid and bring things down with them as their failed jump lands them back on the floor where they started.

I'm supposed to be the Queen of the house but these three interlopers have totally upset my castle. I must admit I'm floundering a bit in my attempt to regain control. The kittens have absolutely no respect for my status. Gasp! There have been some kitty whispers around here that the real queens of the house are Splats and Carina and that I'm only a princess waiting in line for their shared throne.

Walk through the house at your own risk, for lurking around any corner, under any table, in any doorway is likely to be a miniature tiger flattened out in a crouch, eyes intensely full of anticipation, rears occasionally quivering with excitement, all ready to explode in a mock-fierce lionlike charge toward the prey. By the way, the prey is any cat or human who happens to come along at the right time.

Like releasing a coiled spring, a kitten launches himself at a moving human leg, forelegs poised to embrace the victim's ankle. The kitten grabs the ankle, gives a nicely inhibited playful nip at it, then races off in the opposite direction thinking he's going to manage to hide before the human sees him. Should the victim be feline, the kitten launches himself at the victim's neck, playfully wrapping his forepaws around the neck and biting at the side of the victim's neck in an attempt to pull the victim down. The result of such a mock attack on a feline victim is that the attacker either gets hissed at and swatted or should the victim be tolerant, he/she may merely shake the kitten off and stroll noncholantly on as if nothing happened. Unfortunately, even if you hiss at the kittens the next time you stroll through the house you're likely to be a target of their mischief again.

I'm finding it hard to outdo the kittens in the mischief department! Although I still hold the record for being able to scissor a cord in two with my teeth in milliseconds (providing Mom hasn't cheated and put Bitter Apple on it), the kittens now are trying to chew cords too. Go get your own acts, brats. Chewing cords is MY claim to fame (or infamy).

When I go to beg or attempt to steal food from Mom, I usually also have to fight off at least two of the three little terrors and sometimes they steal the tidbit from me. I'm a lady in that I may hiss and swat air but I won't actually hit a kitten unless it hurts me first and even then I'm careful to keep my claws sheathed.

Worst of all, when I have to suffer the indignity of being hounded by these three juvenile delinquents, certain other cats sit, watch, and actually SNICKER at me, "Hey Uno, remember what they say about paybacks?"

Now what reason would another cat have to say that about me?

How can I regain proper control of my castle?

 
 

Leave A Comment | 2 people already have

Purred by: WeBeesSiameezers (Catster Member)

November 27th 2013 at 9:09 am

We feel if we were right there...joining in the fun...well, maybe not fun, but us two can do the 'herd of elephants' thing, too...

Vivid mews, Uno!
We enjoyed reading this kitty havoc tail!
Purred by: Platelicker ♥ DB#69 (Catster Member)

November 27th 2013 at 2:28 pm

MOL! That is quite a story Uno!

Huggs,
Platelicker


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