mommy interviews the small cat

Andy: um iz not small. I three.

Mommy: You are small and a baby.

Andy: Yeah, I still a baby. I got squashed today and you knocked me off the table!

Mommy: I am sorry that the granny scruched you. Is the paw ok? You are so small and light and underfoot all the time. You follow us around all the time. I didn't mean to make you fall off the table kitty. But you have to stay off the table.

Andy: (Looks at paw) Yeah, it ok. I like going up on the tables and counter. That's where I find all my treasures to play soccer with.

Mommy: Oh you mean like the grape tomato? Which is probably rotting where ever you shot and lost it.

Andy: Hee hee....oh yeah... when I bite it to carry it down. Tomato guts oozed out! But I have lost all my toys mommy.

Mommy: Tomorrow, beast, I will look for them.

Andy: Goody... check under the hutch. Hey, I saw many zombies today.

Mommy: Uh huh... beast I saw you sleeping in your rocking chair earlier.

Andy: I was not sleeping on duty mommy. But dose zombies make mez tired!!

Mommy: So how many did you kill today?

Andy: Well, I think three and then my tazer gun died.

Mommy: Oh...

Andy: Hence, the nap on the rocking chair.

Mommy: Do you have a sword like the others?

Andy: No, it too heavy...sometimes I use poison darts. I shot them through a big wood straw. I like those... But I lent it to one of the cats from Africa.

Mommy: Baby have you seen the zombies take a kitties brain?

Andy: Hell no, although I saw some chasing a horse. They suck da brains out. They evil... I would like to get them all off the earth! Make it safe for all!

Mommy: Good for you beast. But remember its always good to pace yourself so you don't get run down.

Andy:(sighs) I guess. But it's so fun.... chasing dose zombies. Dey think wez so stupid. They are invisible in dere spheres flying around. But don't they know that the spheres make a buzzing sound when flying? Idiots.


Mommy: Yeah but zombies aren't the smartest.

Andy: Oh. dat not true... they just don't roam around groaning. One that we were tracking was like unabomber smart...

Mommy: Really?

Andy: Yeah,,, he were tough to take down but we did it.

Mommy: So what are you doing tommorow?

Andy: Sleeping!

Mommy: Good let's start now. I am exhausted.

Andy: I get da soft blanky!!!

Mommy: Whatever....

Leave a Comment