August 14th 2013 9:03 am
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I know for Mommy this is a very hard day. We knew each other so briefly. I had been found, wandering the streets. I had been taken in by a lady who placed me, with other rescues, in a man's garage. The lady had suspected tht my original person might had died, because I was confused the way a can who has never been outside or been subject to being homeless was.
The man wasn't unkind, but he wasn't someone who knew cats. He told the rescuer in a couple weeks that she had to find another place for all of us. She handed us over to a rescue with a good reputation.
However, no one is sure how long I really wasn't eating for. The volunteers tried to coax me to eat, but I had never been in a place with so many cats. I wasn't in a cage, but there were so many other cats. I didn't know where my person was.
I was probably sick when I went there, and Mommy and Daddy, who were volunteering, along with good kind volunteers (I was named Cecilia for one of them)worked so hard to try to get me to eat.
The rescoue founder agreed I needed to go to the vet. But when I got there, though 'treated', he told the rescue founder that 'I was an old cat, and money shouldn't be spent on me, I should be euthanized.'
They wouldn't agree to that, but they also did not want to pay to have me stay there longer than the week I was there. I had a feeding tube put in, but it's not clear as to how often I was really being fed. You see, I had hepatic lipadosis.
At this point, Mommy and Daddy said they would adopt me. They told the rescue founder, because the vet was threatening to put me to sleep that day. Daddy got on the phone and told them that if they did that he would make sure that they were sorry.
The rescue founder agreed Mommy and Daddy could take me. Mommy and Daddy went over to the vets office. THE VET HAD REMOVED THE FEEDING TUBE!!!!
They told Mommy and Daddy I was eating on my own. This was a lie. Mommy tried everything, and the next morning I was taken to Mommy and Daddy's vet for the other cats. They immediately hospitalized me, but because of my weakened condition, I couldn't have the tube reinsterted. A nose tube had to be done, which isnt' nice.
But I started to make a little progress. Slow, steady, and yet, I was getting a little better....
Dr. M had told Mommy that I looked more chipper, and appeared to be making progress....
but that was my last night...
The next day, I was gone.
I left on a Monday.
That Friday, Mommy and Daddy, still grieving, and in South Carolina, drove to Angel Oak-a wonderful old tree on John's Island. It's thousands of years old...
And from underneath a car poked a little nose, attatched to a kitten.
He became the little brother I left as my Legacy: CK Angel Ryder.
Today, as I purr into the radiant band of light that is the Universe-and I contemplate the jump to lightspeed back to say 'yes, we are cat, we are magickal', I dedicate this, my legacy of love, to all the rescuers, who have loved, and lost, and loved and saved again.
Because without you, I wouldn't have had a chance at all....
and we are, all of us, Miracles in Fur, simply waiting for the next to occur.
Thank you and much love....
Cee Cee Ryder
August 14th 2012 3:28 pm
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It is no small surprise to me that you almost forgot it-the day that a lovely soft furred cat with huge peacock colored wings alighted before me, all softness and with a gentle purr held out a paw.
I knew her, of course. For everyone knows Angel Alex. In the second she alighted, her soft 'whoosh' of landing and the way she softly crossed the small space between us.
the words were unspoken at first, for as cats, we don't need words as humans do.
But I saw her, and beheld the most magickal creature ever. She cocked her head to one side and her eyes held mine.
the question was there....'Will you come?'
I felt a wave of sadness. For you, for Daddy, for my own past. Why?
But I knew the answers lay beyond me.
And Alex answered me 'You are much loved...you may continue the fight, and I will be with you, if you so choose.'
I was so tired Mommy. I had been so tired and weary. I wanted to find wellness again, and knew that Alex knew what I was going through. I told her that I was sad and worried and she touched her nose to me.
And suddenly, the first flash of wellness came over me. I could feel energy singing in me. I knew that this was not the end, dear dear person who was so kind. It was the beginning for me.
For Alex and I-are we not alike?
and so, dear Mom...and you are my mom...I say to you I rubbed my cheek against Alex's and she extended her wings, and carefully, I crept under one...and then...
I knew I had left my body behind, but it was no matter...for I was still Me. And I told myself that I would find a way to let you know.
So it was only right that a few days later a small, spunky and resilliant black and white kitten found his way to you, and you to him.
Ah, my little one..you have grown up....and I am so happy you have the human Mom I could send to you.
Mom, please don't be sad.....and no regrets or recriminations. You blame yourself for leaving me at the cat house for too long, for not seeing the stressed out housecat that could not understand what had happened. But things were not yours to see, dear human....you got me in from the streets , it was not your fault that I could not adjust. This was just something that happened before I came to you. And you trusted the Rescue because why would a rescue lady who had a 'good reputation' lie to you or daddy?
You only found out later the person she was.
And the vet she used...well...
It is OVER.
If humans and furs take anything away from my story, it is to trust what you feel, don't use a vet you don't like...no matter what. The same with any rescue...for people can be failable.
But let me tell you that I am happy and content. I can fly and travel. I have at times looked in on you. I have spoken with Ruffy. I have touched noses to Big Harry and looked out for the little ones down there...and then, those like me.
So it does not surprise me that you are working with the Brooklyn Bridge Animal Coilition to save a 15 year old cat abandoned at a high kill shelter in NY-a cat that looked so fearsome and frightened in her picture that no rescue showed even a minor interest besides BB-bless them.
she right now in on 'scratch hold' (she scratched someone,and then caught a cold, so they need to hold her for a bit because of this, we believe). Rest assured Mom I am looking over her. But it surprises us not at all you
said you would foster her...because she was the cat no one would take...excpet BB and you.
So....dear Mom, I know you did not forget...fir I am every homeless, abandoned cat, as we all are....as we are also the most wonderful creatures, filled with magick, love and light...and this side of the rainbow...or that....
We are all.....always....the magick of Cat.
Thank you Mom...
I celebrate my all too brief time with you....my wonderful life...and all the wonder that we all share as felines.
love and purrs,
Cee Cee Ryder Knowles
August 5th 2012 6:30 am
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Today was the day mom and dad rescued me from the rescue I lived in. I was there a short time, I had been taken in, after living in a garage for a little while with some other cats. I had been rescued by a kind person from the streets of Brooklyn, after probably being put out by someone...
As I was a senior, it was always always wondered if my person had passed on, wound up in a nursing home, or if I had been lost. As mom did look at lost and founds on Pet Finder for me, and never saw anything, she always wondered.
I was bought to the Cat Rescue...but I hated it. I was frightened and stopped eating. I might not have been eating for some time. Mommy and Daddy and Auntie Celia, the lady who worked there tried to help me. Nothing worked.
I don't want to go over what happened...for it doesn't matter now. You can read it on my page. Suffice to say, Mommy and Daddy adopted me to get me the care I so badly needed....but it was too late.
Mommy always regrets not stepping in sooner. But she could not know that not all rescues are good. Nor are vets. The strongest caution my story offers is to be careful where a cat goes...rescue or vet.
Now, after a year, I live here at the Bridge. I am fine...my little earthly friend CK Angel Ryder lives with Mom and Dad...my gift to them for all they did for me.
Mommy, don't be sad. You and Daddy did all you could. I made the choise when Alex, her peacock colored wings blazing before me, gave me the choice...fight...continue...or leap the light fantastic and catch hold of my paw and soar with me to the beginning of all.
I simply could not resist. I loved you...and I know you and Dr. P and the good Vets and staff of Vet Care Unlimited did all you could to erase the bad concentration camp of Howard Beach Animal Clinic from my memory. But even so, dear people, I hold no grudges, for we cats are bigger than that.
And today, I stand, one paw foward, with the Greats here....Big Harry on my Right, Queen T on my left, Angel Alex nearby sweeping along on such bright wings, Calvin and Hazel Lucy and Natasha, and Tigger, and Ollie and tiny little Silvio and...all those who have come here...and I look into a million shades of emerald and gold and blue and hazel and those colors in between, and I turn my head to watch as a feline spirit and soul leaps high into the blue sky and then turning a summmersalt, folds back wings and hurtles down toward that place where the material world of earth is...and I know and can feel his joy as he becomes again fur and purrs to reunite with his pawrents.
Oh my friends, my furs, my people....never fear. We are beyond Real. We are Cat.
And we are Miracles in Fur.
I miss you Mommy. Daddy. Those who saved me and those like me.
And I touch you all with Power of the Paw...
And on this...my Gotcha Day...I send healing miracle energy to those who need it most.
With all my deepest love...
CeeCee Ryder Knowles
June 30th 2012 9:20 pm
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Today was the birthday my pawrents chose for me. They thought it suited me...and so it does.
I know they thought of me today, and I know Daddy said...'I miss our Cee Cee'.
Daddy, you don't need to miss me. I'm so close. And I sent you that little black and white guy that makes you laugh and yell a dozen times a day. Wasn't he a great present from me daddy?
Thank you all...please know that I appreciate your kindness....and all the wonderful good wishes.
with mucy love,
Cee Cee Ryder Knowles
November 8th 2011 11:10 am
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So hi everyone,
This is CeeCee. Did anyone ever tell you that here at the Bridge we're Butterfly Cats when we choose to be? We have soft and silky angel wings, true. But we can sit by the Bridge Arch and wish Butterflies to you...to flutter around and bring magick!
Today I'm enjoying the warm up here with my Guardian Alex, and stretching out to sun with Boxie Brown. Both have taken a little time off from their vast duties to celebrate a gorgeous day we've sent our folks. Jack the large Fluffy cat came up the other day...he was mourning his person but he's doing so much better now...he had a purpose, of course, becuase he's going to reform how we animals fly on planes in cargo.
Yes, I have found my 'lady' and family up here....and bounded around with them and love them....there is nothing like a warm lap up here, and purrs and tuna and lots of soft warm breezes.
Yet, I wanted to send my 'foster mom' and 'foster dad' who became my lion hearted and tiger spirited pawrents for real...I wanted to send them some lovely warm weather and lots of love and purrs. I need to do that, because I know for them, it's been tough.
I know when Mommy went to the vet yesterday it was very hard for her to hear they hadn't sent my little mortal body out yet. I mean, the lady has been through too much pain, and this she didn't need. So when I watched over her last night I took away the headache that she's had for 2 days, and reached out to give her some sunshine and warm weather. We can do that up here, you know! We can bring sunshine and love and lots of light!
And I did.
And I know when Mommy looked at the little present like packages last night....with Oscar's pawprints and my pawprints in them....that she started to cry....and she was sad, remembering us. But ah, Mommy, can you know the wonder that I can know? That you were there for me, that you and Daddy fought so hard for me, that the fight wasn't lost, my dear Mommy, but simply conceded as I turned and saw Alex, wings spread out with crystals and healing energys surrounding me...and others...with such love...and it was time, Mommy. It was time. And even as I pressed my little pawprints onto your heart...well, Mommy, my mommy...you pressed your handprint onto mine...and our hearts belong to each other...and daddy's too.
And so, Mommy...please know...no matter how sad you are...that I'm well, and strong, and that as Oscar bounds by with some other funny and fresh boycats, and I hear Miss Charlotte whisper 'ah, but they bound back into time, to those who love them, eventually...' I turn and with a slow blink that bespeaks cat love...and I say 'yes....always'. For love will never cease when a heart is true.
love, with butterfly kisses,
CeeCee Ryder Knowles
September 5th 2011 3:34 pm
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This is Cee Cee's mom.
I wanted to share something that happened yesterday.
We were invited to a barbecue at the Rescue's Freeport office, which was lovely. It was to thank the volunteers and everyone who helped to evacuate during the hurricane.
When there, we met a young woman vet who had seen Cee Cee when she was at Howard Beach Animal Clinic.
She was a tall young lady, and kindness eminated from her. She said how sorry she was to hear about CeeCee. She hadn't known any of what had happened. She doesn't work every day, and she had not known of what happened with Cee Cee til she was told.
She was able to tell us that Cee Cee, during her time there, had her feeding tube kink. Apparently this caused problems. It might have been why it was removed.
She also was able to share a few pictures, a couple of them of Cee Cee eating some ham from her sandwich.
She didn't know alot-she did tell us that she thought that Cee Cee had been beginning to respond, but there were problems with the feeding tube.
I told her I was still very very upset, as NO ONE AT ANY TIME TOLD US THERE WERE PROBLEMS WITH THE TUBE AT ALL!!!!
We didn't want to make her uncomfortable...she was kind, and obviously cared about Cee Cee. Yet...why didn't she say or do something? I understand having to pay back school loans and all...but we feel so upset, still.
But the pictures were nice to see...and she was a nice person.
But maybe it explained somehow why that bad vet took out the feeding tube.
Somehow it bought the grief and the anger back. I just feel so furious...why didn't someone do something?
I know, I know, she's at Rainbow Bridge and all. But that doesn't make it feel better for us.
I only hope that someday we can make sure this never happens to another animal or their people.
Sorry to vent,
Cee Cee's mom
August 15th 2011 6:13 am
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Just to let everyone know, I am now at Rainbow Bridge. I know that mommy and daddy are sad. I am sad to leave them, but it was time. I know that it's difficult for them to understand, but I was ready to go. There were a few kitties who had decided that it was just too hard to remain in our fur forms here.
A lovely few cats came to take us...one of them was Alex. She told me not to be afraid, and told me that you miss your people, but that Rainbow Bridge is lovely, and when I'm up to it, I willl return to my people and meow.
I wanted to say thank you to the wonderful vets who loved me, little Dr. Miglirino, who was so kind. Dr.Paloni, who is so wise and fought so hard for me, and the staff who loved me and made me a nice bed and took such excellent care of me. If love could have kept me here, then they would have done so by sheer will and skill alone.
I want to thank Auntie Lisa and Alex, I want to thank my Kaci Sunshine and her mom for their kindness, and indeed, all of you.
Please, everyone, furred and their family and friends, please know that we here are fine, and I'm getting well again. Miss Mittens just came and said hello, and I'm going to go off with her later and see some of this lovely place. But for now, I'm sitting here, under a lovely shade tree, and sharing a cup of comfort with my wonderful Alex, who remains my Guardian Angel.
Please too, good people, if you have a feeling that a vet is not doing right by your cat, do get another vet. I know that my wonderful Dr. P and Dr. M and the whole staff of Vet Care Unlimited were ANGELS and perhaps things would have been so different if they had gotten my case first. But...one must not cry over spilled milk, and it was my time...and yes, I will return.
lots of love to all,
I love you now and always,
Cee Cee Ryder Knowles
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