Toby's Diary

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Love in the Morning

July 30th 2012 10:35 pm
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I often like to be next to my mum. She sits on the sofa and I sit on the arm of the sofa and sometimes she says "Kiss?" and I go nose to nose and give her an eskimo kiss and then we have purrs and strokes - but only in the morning, of course. If I gave her love in the evening that wouldn't be right.

She asked for a kiss yesterday evening and I just looked at her. "Why do I only get love in the morning?" she wanted to know.

"So when you leave us for the day your heart is all full and happy. when you are home with us you're happy anyway."

"Oh. What if I had a bad day and need love in the evening?"

"Just the sight of your adorable cats should be sufficient."

That might sound harsh but I don't often like to be picked up and cuddled and I didn't want to encourage that.

She seemed Ok with the whole happy heart thing but that isn't the real reason. I actually give her lots of headrubs befoe she goes out to make sure that if she meets any cats on her way they will smell me on her and know that she has a person already. You can't be too careful when you have a well-trained human. You don't want other cats moving in on them and taking the benefit of your hard work.


Mum's Story Book

July 29th 2012 10:43 pm
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Last week mum had a letter from her niece which is called Ariane. Ariane is on school holidays and she was a bit bored so she had drawn my mum some pictures. Mum decided she would write but rather than just a letter she would make up a story and write that for Ariane.

"Will it be about us? I think she would like that best of all." I asked.

Mum said it would as Ariane indeed loves cats so mum thought about what her story would be. Then she thought it would be good to draw some pictures to go with it. She got some rough paper and worked out how many pages she would need and what picturse and what words would go on each and then she started work.

The story was mostly about me of course so Josie didn't appear until Page Four. By that stage mum was pretty good at drawing me and colouring me in - all black with big eyes and leave a white patch on my chest.

Then she looked at Josie. Josie is a rather more complicated cat to colour in, there's no getting around that. You would have to know Josie quite well to recognise her from mum's efforts with a gold pen and the black pen. She says if she ever does another one there will be rather less Josie in it. Quite right too!

Anyway my story is gone in an envelope and off to Scotland so I hope that Ariane likes it.


Grumpy mum

July 26th 2012 10:38 pm
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It's still warm here. Mum doesn't sleep so well so we leave her to it. She should try the whole sleeping thing with a fur coat on!

Last night she got in from her dance class and sais she would open all the doors and windows for half an hour before going to bed. You can imagine how enthusiastically Josie and I took to that.

Outside I found a tiny little baby frog. The last one I found was massive but surely mum couldn't object to this minute one. She would hardly know he was there. Best of all she couldn't stop me. There could be no misunderstandings by the magic door, I just walked right in and put him down on the carpet.

He was so small it took my mum a moment to realise what he was. She shrieked in excitement and then joined in chasing him.

"See how much fun it is!"

But when she caught him instead of putting him back down and sharing she took him outside and dropped him.

"Don't worry mum. I'll find him for you. I won't go to bed until he's safely back indoors"

Oddly my mum shut the back door but I was undeterred. Josie helped but we couldn't see him. Mum kept calling is saying she needed to sleep and couldn't if we were outdoors but a promise is a promise. You would have thought, given that it was her fault he went missing, that she would have been a bit more supportive.

After about an hour I did come in to give her an update but she flipped the thing on my door so I couldn't go out again. One cat to go. Josie said it was so deliciously cool rolling on the concrete, no way was she coming inside.

Mum went to bed saying that she had left the door so Josie could come in but I don't think anyone was fooled. Every ten minutes or so she would get up and try and call Josie in and Josie would look at her and roll and I would try make good my escape.

It was pretty late it is true by the time the three of us were all safely indoors for the night. She says it's lack of sleep but I think she's regretting her foolishness in dropping the frog. Maybe I'll find him again this morning and make her happy.

Oh and mum says one of her friends was at the dress rehearsal for the Lympics Opening Ceremony on Wednesday and says it is amazing but wouldn't tell her anything at all about it so it will be a surprise.


Our Wishes

July 25th 2012 10:44 pm
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The most delicious part of a sunny day is evening time. The air cools to just right and all the bugs are out to chase.

Yesterday my mum came and sat on the back step watching us play. She said when she first moved in the flat she would do that a lot, just enjoy the sights and sounds of evening and wait for the first star to appear so she could make a wish.

"Did your cats like that too?"

"I didn't have cats then."

WHAT? Mum without cats. That's impossible. How did she know what time to get up in the morning? Who made her laugh when she was tired? Who purred for her when she was sad? I expect when she saw that star she wished for cats and here we are.

"I know what I will wish for tonight."

"What's that?"

"I wish I was a professional cat toy tester like my mate Monster. New toys to play with and the world waiting for my opinion. I would love that."

I pretty know what the others will wish for too. Josie wants to be adopted by Alan Titchmarsh. He is a gardening guy who is on the TV and when he is on Josie goes all mushy and rubs her head against the screen. Mum says he does like cats but he would have to fight her for Josie. And mum wants to marry Richard Armitage. He is an actor and when he is on the TV mum goes all mushy and rubs her head against the screen. (Comment from Toby's mum: I do not! OK Maybe a little)

So we waited and waited for our magic star. This story should end with the star appearing and all our wishes coming true but truth be told mum had to admit the sky had clouded over, no starts tonight, so we all went to bed and I'll have to keep finding my own fun, Josie has to stay with us and we get to keep mum all to ourselves. Maybe the magic stars know what they are doing after all.


Almost normal

July 24th 2012 10:36 pm
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We are so nearly back to normal but mum has been going out at odd times and coming back smelling of other cats.

She reckons she has been feeding my mates Sandy and Minnie while their people are away and she said they also need some stroking and chatting to as they miss their people.

"But what about us?"

"You're never indoors now it's sunny anyway."

It is true. I am working on fitting two months worth of outdoor play into this week. But Josie is. Actually Josie is still being a wimp and sleeping right by mum at night and purring like mum was gone for one year not one night.

Mum promises today is the last day she'll be feeding them and then she is absolutely exclusively ours.


Not quite back to normal

July 23rd 2012 10:37 pm
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My mum lied. She promised we would be all back to normal - and then came home very late from work. She reckons it wasn't her fault as there was an accident on the motorway but how does that help our poor empty tummies?

Josie decided she had gone away again but we found big bag so I didn't think she had.

At bedtime Josie was seriously uncool. She settled herself to sleep right next to mum and kept reaching out and touching her and giving her gentle sniffs and purring as mum was definitely there. You'll be glad to know I was much more sensible and was my normal self.

I was going to say that we are having a hot, sunny week but then we remember how hot some of our friends are so I have to say warm, sunny week. I said I thought that will be good for oh! Lympics that start any day now but mum says the Rain Man says it will be raining by then so that's OK. We wouldn't want to give any kind fo false impression of our country.


I didn't like my weekend

July 22nd 2012 10:41 pm
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When my mum came home on Friday we were confused. She was tidying up like guests were coming but big bag was there like she was going away.Turned out both happened.

On Friday evening quite late her friends arrived. I normally like friends but they were quite noisy and they had one of those miniature ones who kept running at me. Mum said she only wanted to play but I didn't trust her so I kept well clear.

The part I did like was when they blew up a large mattress and made the whole sitting room floor into a giant soft bed and I liked walking on that but I wasn't allowed to sleep there. When I got to mum's bed Josie was limpet-like clinging to the safety of mum.

The next morning it was all very noisy again and I went out. I kept coming back in to check but they kept being there so I kept going out again.

When they did leave mum rushed round and tidied again and then grabbed big bag and off she did go and she was gone even all night. If it hadn't been for next door coming round we would have starved.

Anyway mum came back last night and promises everything will be back to normal now. She had been to see Charlie and Cecil, the kittens whose photo is on my page. She says they are pretty big now and Cecil has the biggest fluffiest tail she has ever seen on a cat so they call him PlatyPuss as that's what he looks like.

Last week my mum was trying to swap some of our rain with some of the sun they are having in America right now as they want rain. We had a gloriously hot and sunny weekend so hopefully that means our rain clouds are safely making their way to where they are needed.


Carved by Great Grandmother - and Josie

July 19th 2012 10:39 pm
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Mum doesn't come from the kind of family with lots of heirlooms but one thing she does have is a small table with a patterned top that was carved by her Great Grandmother. Years before my mum was borned her father's father's mother worked on this piece of furniture and it has been kept in the family ever since.

Now Josie thinks the pattern could be improved. It began when she was trying to hook a toy and she realised that the wood is softer than it looks. Mum and I didn't realise that the noise we heard was repeated clawing so she's been doing it a while. So now there is the the original design and Josie's additions. They aren't very deep at present but she says she is doing a little every day.

Mum saw this last night and said, "oh" and then she said, "oh well" and then she explained that none of her family are particularly good at artistic stuff and on the evidence of the quality of carving Great Grandmother did that is something that's been true for many generations.

Mum's favourite Great Grandmother stories involve her enviable ability to drink pints of cream with no ill effect and of her kindness but there are never any stories about her passion for woodcarving - so mum thinks Great Grandmother wouldn't really mind too much - but could Josie work on something a bit more symmetrical? Josie is going to try.


Does anyone want to swap mums?

July 18th 2012 10:43 pm
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Firstly she was late home with nary a care for her poor starving kitties. She said we had biscuits down but it wasn't my biscuit belly that was empty.

Then after I had my supper I went for a chat and could smell on her hands - she had been petting DOGS!! She said they were very nice dogs but I was not to be placated. I wouldn't let her even stroke me until she had washed her hands several times and the smell was faded.

Then I was having great fun chasing a moth. I love moths, there's something about the way their wings flitter. But this moth flew up to the ceiling out of reach and there he stayed. So I went to my mum and mewed until she got the message. She got a stick and poked him and off we went. Brilliant!! Then I lost him again. I went back to mum and mewed and mewed that she should find him for me but she wouldn't. She said he could be anywhere and that's why I needed her.

So she was a bit rubbish last night.

But I do love her really so I forgave her after several hours had passed. By then she was asleep so I woke her up to give her some Toby Snuggle and let her know that despite her many failings she is still my favourite and we are all friends again this morning.


Naughty Josie gets her comeuppance

July 17th 2012 10:35 pm
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Mum said that we weren't to wake her early for games today as she is tired. When I woke up I went and sat quietly on the window sill and watched the world and my mum was peacefully sleeping.

Then Josie came along. I could see her stop and think. Mum was sleeping on Josie's pillow. Now there had been something about not waking for play but did that apply to waking for sleep? Josie concluded that it didn't so she woke mum up to move her head.

Mum shifted across and Josie curled up in her rightful place and both settled back down again. I saw all of this and what do we do with cats who disobey an instruction about sleeping? Exactly, Whacky Paw!

I bent down and started administering the punishment. Josie did reach up and fight back and this is where it gets funny - Josie got her claws stuck in the curtains so I could batter her about and she couldn't do anythinmg about it - except growl.

I am sorry to say that the growling woke mum up and she detached Josie's claws, not without some difficulty as Josie had managed to weave her paw through the bedstead before getting it hooked and at one point I could see mum looking up at the curtain rail to see if she might have to take the curtains down to release Josie without hurting her but all's well that ends well and Josie is freed.

And now mum was awake she might as well play so the story has a happy ending.

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