Toby's Diary

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A most Mysterious Mystery

October 2nd 2012 10:37 pm
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My mum's first priority when she gets in from work is naturally our supper. Then she goes and changes out of her worky clothes.

So last night as normal she went to her bedroom and then she called out, "Cats?" so we went to see what was occurring as cats is us.

"What happened to the curtains?" she wanted to know. When she had gone to work they were hanging neatly, now one of the middle hooks had unhooked and there will need to be some sewing done on the top part.

"Sometimes a little whorl of gravity rises us and grabs things," I explained. "I didn't see that happen today but maybe it did while we were sleeping."

She looked at me in a way I could not like.

"Josie," she said. "Have you got anything better?"

Josie thought and then wondered aloud if we might, and she didn't want to scare anyone as she wasn't certain, but it could just be possible that we might have a poltergeist.

Mum sighed. "I suspect the cause to be rather more small, black and feline. I just want to know how you managed to dislodge a middle curtain-hook and simultaneously rip the stitching at the end."

It seemed safest to stick with my gravity grabbing story so mum will never know the answer to that particular mysterious mystery!


I don't like rain

October 1st 2012 10:40 pm
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We only go outdoors when mum is home on account of her being rather good at seeing off bad cats. Most mornings I have a run in the garden before mum goes to work just to check everything is OK out there and she calls me back in, usually rustling a bag of treats, when it's time for her to go.

Yesterday I was out when it started raining heavily. I took shelter under the Christmas Tree. We have an all year round one in our garden. Years ago mum was about to put one put for shredding when she noticed that despite much neglect over the festive season it was still alive. Anything that wanted to live that much should be given a chance so she planted it and it's lived happily in our garden ever since. It shows its gratitude for not being shredded by providing an all year round shelter for cats.

So there I was all dry and there was the gap between me and home all wet. I heard mum call but didn't know what to do.

She came out and was calling me.

"I'm here" I whimpered in my most piteous mew.

"Where?" I could hear her blundering about as she tried to see me. I was deeply hidden at the driest part.

I mewed again and then saw her face as she bent down to see me.

"Come here Toby"

"I can't."

I must have sounded serious as she looked quite worried. "Are you OK?"

"I don't want to get wet."

Happily for both of us she had a bag of treats in her hand and managed to tempt me closer to the edge and next thing I knew I was scooped up in a most undignified manner and we were running through the rain back home.

I think it was worth it. Home is the best place to be when it's wet and if I can't chase frogs I can always chase Josie.


Mum went away

September 30th 2012 10:34 pm
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She just put some stuff in a bag and off she went. Luckily people from next door came to feed us but I still wasn't happy.

She came home on Sunday and I was all ready to sulk but she had brought home a catnip cigar. I go crazy for catnip. It's my one vice.

Last night I slept snuggled up really close to her so I could know she hadn't gone away again. The funny thing when I do that is - even asleep she seems to know not to roll on me so she only moves in one direction. When she moves away I move with her so I can still be nestled.

So we gradually move closer and closer to the edge of the bed through the night and she wakes up clinging on to a few inches, just about not falling off, with me close to her and the whole of the rest of the bed all empty.

I have given her lots of purrs and headrubs and dribble so she'll never want to go away again and she said she did miss me. She said she missed Josie too but I bet she missed me the most.


If you're going to barf...

September 27th 2012 10:32 pm
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Josie really impressed me this morning. Feeling her tummy churning she did not waste the moment.

Up she jumped to the mantelpiece and pondered where would be the best place to lean. Ah yes- that would do it as she noticed mum's cardigan draped over the back of a chair. Mum came in way too late to do anything about it and there was the contents of Josie's tummy all down the back of the cardigan.

Josie swears it was an accident and she didn't realise how bad she felt until it was too late but what makes the whole thing more funny is that as mum was scrambling around to get to work and everything she didn't check the wash instructions and now the cardigan is somewhat smaller than it was.

I was enjoying seeing Josie in trouble but then mum said if I didn't steal her food she might not feel she has to eat so fast and would hold on to it. It is true I am eating extra at the moment as I need to build my winter tummy to keep me warm. Mum says there's plenty for both of us but why take the chance?


Being stressed

September 26th 2012 10:39 pm
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When mum came home from work yesterday she picked me up for a cuddle.

"Toby," she said. "I've had a hectic strssed day and I need a cuddle."

I did not wish to be cuddled and I said so. "I had a hectic strssed day too. Put me down!"

She did put me back on the floor but wanted to know just how I had managed to get hectic and stressed.

"You didn't rub my tummy when I first rolled over this morning and I had to ask several times for breakfast and that's stressful - and I have a busy daily schedule of naps, Josie training and looking out of the window to do while you're out."

She didn't look as convinced by this explanation as I had hoped and it seemed a good idea to take a stroll outdoors just then.

When I came back in I could hear something odd- birdsong indoors. Right - I would get those feathery monsters if they thought they could invade my territory. But I couldn't find them and mum admitted she had put on her plinky plonk relaxy CD and it has birdsong on it. That might have relaxed her but it didn't do anything for my nerves.

Hopefully we'll all have a more calm day today.


Winter Games

September 25th 2012 10:34 pm
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The evenings are becoming dark and cold outdoors but indoors is warm and light and there are no scary things unless you count my mum singing. The only thing wrong is that it isn't as big as outdoors.

In the garden I run and run but yesterday I ran and ran inside and ran out of floor and had to go up the curtains.

Mum looked at me hanging up there and sighed.

"Is it toy box time?"

I scrambled down as fast as I could. I love toybox time.

Mum admitted she thought I had grown out of it but it's only that I've been chasing frogs and dragons outdoors. I had forgotten the simple pleasures of chasing toy mice and balls around the place. I had a brilliant time except when mum talked on the phone and I had to climb up her leg to get her attention.

I was sad because my summer was going away but I think we're going to be alright after all!


My evil twin

September 24th 2012 10:37 pm
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I wandered in the sitting room to chat with my mum yesterday. She looked up at me and then said, "it's funny - in some lights your eyes look a golden brown and in some almost green."

"What colour are they today?"


I am never one to miss an opportunity.

"You know how I am a perfect sweetie pie cat who never does anything wrong except sometimes?"

"Hm" was all she would commit to.

I explained, "The golden eyed cat is my evil twin. I am always good but he sneaks in and steals Josie's food and knocks your toys off shelves."

"I prefer to call them ornaments and I think I would have noticed if we had an extra cat."

But I'm fairly sure I have sewn seeds of doubt in her mind and shall blame the twin for everything from now on.

It rained so very much yesterday and mum's car did not do well in its check up. Apparently the best way for mum to cope with this gloom was to watch a funny film and to eat cake and we were curled up, one on either side of her and she said that made her feel much happier. I must have been good green eyed Toby!


The rain is back

September 23rd 2012 11:23 pm
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Saturday was one of my happiest days ever. The sun shone all day and mum was home so I could run around in the garden and chase things and then I got sleepy and came in and mum rubbed my tummy for a while and reminded me what a handsome boy I am and then I slept and dreamed of all the adventures I had enjoyed.

I wished every day could be a sunny Saturday and mum said she knew what I meant but maybe we wouldn't enjoy it so much if it was.

Because Sunday it rained and rained. I did go out but it's not nearly so much fun when your fur gets damp.

And it's raining today. The only good part is mum says she isn't going to work.

"How come?"

Turns out cars and cats have more than two letters in common - they also have an annual check up only rather than a letter from the vet they have to have theirs by law and no letter. Last week Mum was chatting with a friend who said they had nearly forgotten theirs. Mum laughed and said she forgot hers last year. In fact about this time last year. In fact now she came to think about it exactly this time last year! She had forgotten again.

She couldn't get a Saturday one so it's going today. This is good news for us cats as we get a bonus mum day and because mum says she had meant to book Josie's annual check and shots but that will have to wait for next payday so Josie gets a reprieve. Josie says she is feeling unusually healthy and in no need of any vet visit but mum says she will have to go in a couple of weeks to keep her feeling that way.


Josie can be naughty

September 20th 2012 10:33 pm
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Mum was sitting on the sofa last night and Josie was watching her. Then Josie said, "There's something under the throw I need" and she started nosing and clawing at the throw. Mum had no idea what it could be. Had a catnip mouse fallen down there? Had one of us dropped a treat and it had fallen behind?

Josie was so insistently pulling at the throw that mum stood up so Josie could reach.

Faster than you can wash a whisker Josie was on mum's vacant cushion, curled up looking like a cat that had been there for hours.

"Josie!" said mum. I think she had planned to still be sitting there.

Josie looked all round to see who mum was talking to. From the tone it couldn't be her as mum's tone wasn't friendly. Josie looked so sure that she had done nothing wrong that mum laughed and took the other end of the sofa. Score: Josie One, Mum nil.

Josie told me later that she wanted mum's cushion as she knew mum would have warmed up the seat nicely and we definitely have the autumnal chill.


Josie's stupid game

September 19th 2012 10:34 pm
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Mum was home all evening again last night so I was out, chasing dragons and bears. When I came in for my checks on the girls I found them playing Josie's favourite game.

Mum has a low table and she puts a pen on it and tells Josie very solumnly that she wants the pen left just where it is. Josie pretends to agree and walks away. Then she runs back, ambushes the pen from a surprise angle and knocks it to the ground. Then off she runs, chuckling to herself.

Mum pretends to be annoyed and puts the pen back. They can carry this on for hours.

To me the game would only be fun if mum really did want the pen left where it was but we know the difference and Josie only likes it because she can hear mum laughing too. Josie leaves the naughtiness to the expert which is me!

I only managed to catch leaves last night. I did forget to write at the weekend that I caught a real dragon only mum got it and let it go. And said it was a dragon-fly but that's a real type of dragon.

All the purring for Ricky worked and his cone is gone. The report is that he spent a busy evening giving a thorough wash to all those parts he couldn't reach before. His fur will grow back and he'll be good as new.

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