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Toby's Diary

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To be naughty or nice?

December 5th 2013 11:17 pm
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That remains the dilemma. I had some good suggestions from my Catster pals yesterday. I am pretty sure that one big eyed look at Sandy Claws and all will be forgiven. That works on my mum every time. But what if he didn't bring my presents at all? He'll be thinking how cute I am and what I deserve and all those treats and toys will be sitting on a bench in the North Pole being enjoyed by the Elves.

Of course he'll have Josie's toys and stuff with him. She is pretty much always a good cat so maybe he'll give me hers.

Actually - even if he doesn't - what's hers is mine. I was so relieved when I worked that one out. I can be naughty as I like and Josie can be nice and I'll get good stuff from Sandy Claws because I'll take hers.

I actually realised this around 2am.

I woke my mum up to tell her all about it. I was so pleased with myself and purring away as I wanted to explain my theory then and there before I forgot it. My mum wasn't very nice so maybe she won't get anything either and we'll all share Josie's!

Now we're just all relying on Josie to stay nice.

Today we're having a happy day. We have had water coming through from upstairs - again! - and mum is staying home as someone is coming to see what's going on. They reckon they can't see anything up there but we surely can down here. Mum doesn't see that as a happy day but any day she is home is a happy one for us.


I used up my Being Good Quota

December 4th 2013 10:52 pm
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I really hope Sandy Claws was busy elsewhere last night. All that being a good cat on Tuesday had worn me out and Naughty Toby was unleashed.

He has to come out and play sometimes!!

I beat up Josie; I climbed the curtains; I bit my mum (not hard but she was ignoring me!); I was having a marvellous time but mum wasn't so impressed and neither was Josie. She sat on the mantlepiece glowering at me.

I was about to jump up and fight her there but mum called me. She got the mouse chase game out for me and I got my best ever score. I found you can drag the mouse about with your paw which is cool. I never quite managed to get him off the tablet though which is a bit annoying.

Then mum got Da Bird whirring about and I ran and ran until I could run no more.

"Have you run all that naughty out of your system?" asked my mum.

And I had. Josie could climb down from her safety place and Sandy Claws could once again look in our direction. I think I got away with it....I hope I did...


Cheering my mum up

December 3rd 2013 10:40 pm
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My mum was a bit sad last night. She is sad about Ka-zar and she has other friends who are having a bad time right now so she came home from work and sat on the sofa and sighed.

"What's it all about Toby?" she asked.

She needed help and fast and luckily Josie and I were on hand.

I went in the garden to find her a present - a cute little mouse? a funny hopping frog? a whirring bird to fly about? Hm. Such gifts were hard to find. Then I saw the perfect things fluttering about. I grabbed it and ran back to my door.

When mum came to let me in she saw I had something in my mouth and was already squealing in that excited way of hers as I dropped it.

A crunkly, rustly brown leaf.

"Oh Toby," said my mum, picking it up, "What a relief!" So she was already happier.

Then Josie sat on mum's lap and purred and I sat beside her and she had to be happy that we were there to look after her. (I hope Sandy Claws is reading this and popping a few extra gifts in our stockings!!)


Cats and technology

December 2nd 2013 10:28 pm
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We have our own app!! Mum downloaded a game for cats to play.

Josie saw it first. It's not like mum's games; it's much more elegant and straightforward - like us cats. Mum was showing Josie and Josie was looking at the screen. And looking. And looking.

"Go on," said my mum, "See what score you can get."

And Josie went on looking and looking at the screen - which squeaked every now and then.

Later she showed me. In the screen there is a small mouse that runs around. Occasionally he disappears under the edge and you have to run round really fast so he doesn't escape out of the tablet. It's brilliant.

"Try tapping where you see him," said my mum demonstrating. "You get points".

So I did but I didn't get any points. Mum said I need to tap harder but I prefer my version of the game where I run around the tablet and keep the mouse safely inside. He didn't escape so I think we can safely say I won. Of course!



December 1st 2013 10:41 pm
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My mum is getting in the Christmassy Spirit. She was off to the pantomime on Saturday and came back with a cat mask. I like that she wants to look more like us. It can only be an improvement. She had been to see Puss in Boots. I think the best stories are ones where a cat is the hero.

Then on Sunday she produced an Advent Candle.

"Now - you remember the rules about candles?" she asked.

Sweet that she still thinks she gets to set rules. We liked to investigate everything and Josie and I both went over for a sniff.

"I'll light it when you're both asleep," my mum concluded.

I wasn't sure why she had bothered as I remember much leaping up and blowing out the last time - we wake fast! But mum said it was a gift.

Soon it will be time to write our lists for Sandy Claws. Hmmm - what do I want this year?


A battle of wills

November 28th 2013 10:38 pm
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Cat versus human - who will win the epic struggle? (Like you don't already know!)

My mum was late home last night and tired so she wanted to watch TV from her favourite spot on the sofa. So did Josie. Now at first Josie waited politely for the space - surely my mum would soon need a cup of tea or bathroom break. But no, there she sat.

So Josie gently patted the sofa next to mum so mum would know she was waiting.

Mum looked at her. "No Josie. I was here first. Go and sleep in one of the many other cosy places."

This displeased Josie so she went full in with the head, pushing her bony skull up against my mum's side to get her to move.

Mum laughed at first but Josie wasn't giving up. She pushed and she pushed.

Eventually mum said "How can I relax with you doing that?" and shuffled down the sofa to the inferior side. Delighted with herself Josie snuggled down on the cushion, vacated and nicely warmed by mum.

The awesomeness of us cats continues to amaze me!! Cats 1: Mum 0.



November 27th 2013 10:33 pm
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We don't have Thanksgiving over here but I think we should. It's lovely to stop and think of all the things we are thankful for.

Mum says that she is thankful for her very normal life - she has us, her home, her job, her health, her friends and family; things it is very easy to take for granted but not everyone has.

Josie is grateful for warm places to sleep, catnip toys, mum and kitty treats.

I am thankful for all my amazing Catster friends - the best cats on the planet, for my toys especially Da Bird and the laser pointer, for my tummy rubs and just for being a cat. Us cats rock!!

So today we will celebrate and be happy!



November 26th 2013 10:51 pm
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We thought maybe mum was staying home yesterday too as she left later than normal but she said she was on a training day. She had all the paperwork and it said "Go Mad".

I had no idea she had special training for that; I thought it came naturally to her.

Then she said the Mad part stood for Make A Difference. That's always a good thing. Josie and I use our claws to make a difference to the wallpaper, sofa and other furnishings.

When she came back mum was all inspired - and said she had met some interesting people including two from a bank that mum's company works with.

"What were they called?" I asked politely.

Mum looked at me blankly.

"I can't remember. There was a lot going on." More thinking. "One has cats called Boris and Oscar who are black and white."

"So you remember the names of cats you've never met but not the names of the important business contacts?" I asked.

"Yes, that does seem to be the case."

I am so proud of her!


Helping my mum

November 25th 2013 11:04 pm
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Yesterday my mum had the day off work, recovering from her weekend and she announced it was time. Yes - she would be making mine and Josie's Christmas Cards.

None of us are much good at making cards but that doesn't dampen our enthusaism. This year they are meant to look like presents and when you slide the top away from the bottom there are Josie and me wishing you a Happy Christmas. In theory. Mum did manage to glue one entirely shut.

And what kind of a gift doesn't have a ribbon bow? And that is where Josie and I really came into our own. Cats have a very particular affinity with ribbons and I can't believe mum forgot that. She would be trying to tie a neat bow around the card and we would help by tugging the stray ends. We also made them pretty with decorative teeth and claw patterns but she wasn't nearly as appreciative as you would think.

So what with that fun and lots of strokes what with mum being home again that was a pretty top day!


Mum is home again

November 24th 2013 11:19 pm
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I had time to think how I would get my revenge for being abandoned. I went outside, ate some grass and came in and barfed dramatically over everything I could reach.

Then when she tried to sit down for her supper I demanded headrubs, then I wanted to go out, then I wanted to come back in again, then I needed my tummy rubbed (particularly proud of that one - I launched myself in a sideways roll at her so she had to catch me.) Her supper was cold by the time she ate it and serve her right!

Josie just went loopy cat like she always does.

Mum said she had missed us - but added that it had been a strange and pleasant experience to sleep through a whole night without cats waking her up. How could she say that?!

Josie made sure she woke my mum a few times last night for snuggles and stroksies so my mum would remember how lovely it really is. Surely sleep cannot compare to the happy of hearing a purr and knowing you have pleased your cat!

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