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The Floof Report
Pooping for fuel!March 2nd 2011 11:22 am[ View A Comments (30) ]
My mommy watches the news and gets furry frustrated because price of gas for her car keeps going up. She says it's too expensive to go anywhere and good thing spring is coming because she's gonna have to hoof it pretty soon. I don't ever remember seeing hoofs on my mommy's feet but I believe her I guess. Now don't get us wrong because we are fur all the peoples of Libya fighting and dying for their freedom! We think it's great and we stand by them. We hope that they can win this without too many more hoomans going to heaven but mom says that's probably going to happen so we all have to purr hard for them.
oh my catness, this is brilliant. Where is Newman, we have to get him in on this! We must get our best kitty scientist minds on this problem right now. Think of all the nom noms we could buy with the money we make! Whose a good kitty scientist? Hey! I'm all fur poops fur fuel..MOL! What about farts too?? Henry Henry if you can get farts and burps in the mix, all the better. We'll have to see who we end up with for a scientist and ask them if that's an option! Good idea. Yes, nom noms galore River! That's the ticket. I love it! "Poops for fuel" Regular, extra-strength, super stinky strength, and super-loosey strength!!! Think of all the money! But what about the odor pollution!!! MOL! That's where the kitty scientist comes in. We can make it work like methane gas does from cows right? Plus our poopies already stink and our humans may pass out now and then from the stench but I think they've gotten used to it, MOL. They have to decide what's more important. Saving the planet and their wallet or the house smelling like roses all the time (which is doesn't now anyways). HL don't forget the kitties with SPLOOSHY strength poops too. There's a lot of sick ones that sploosh all over the place! Point your tail, MOL! Poops for gas and Tate fur President!! I'm furry surprised. I thought for sure the poop title on my diary would get all kinds of comments! Where is efuryone?! My poops would make great fuel! Mommy had no stinky poops to scoop till I came along...! So, I am here to say, "Count on the 5 of us!" Wow with eight cats in our house we could probably supply fuel for the neighborhood! I bet you'll be a dairy pick for talking about poop! I'm all over this, River! We definitely make enough newmies around here to fuel both cars! And like Skylar said, you're gonna be a dairy pick . . . . oh, wait a minute, I think he mean you're gonna be a diary pick, but milk is okay too! Farts are good, Henry! Especially the stinky ones! We like milk, so a dairy pick or diary pick is good either way! MOL! I wonder do we still gotta cover our poopies of we are pooping for fuel? Cause I am tired of covering for everycat at my house. Tate for president and we can run this country on pure cat poop. Fluff report will cover the important stuff. Sounds like a great plan! I can tell my humans that I only poop right by the garage door so they can know to use it for fuel for their cars! Hee hee! We are definately on board for the pooping for fuel. I'm good at pooping and I don't like to cover mine up. I mean, what's the use. Mom takes it out anyway. I think she makes biofuel from it. We got 3 cat poopers,one dog and 3 horse's pooping. That's a lot of poop!Mom needs a wheel barrel to clean out the horse boxes! Where's my calculator-we gonna be rich. teeehee. Your a smart one for sure Finn. ewww, gross. Boys are such...boys! Oops..I guess my secretary was thirsty! Or maybe it was the mention of methane...reminds me of cows and a dairy! I did really mean diary pick! MOL! Hey Jezebel that's a great idea to just poop by the garage. Why waste time? Horse poop, cow poop, chicken poop, dog, kitty all poop is welcome! KACHINGGGGG!!!!! I've been waiting for the perfect opportunity to say this... "Come on, join me in taking over the world!" We would be the most important animal on earth. Everyone would want a cat then. Super idea. That's what I like about you Zach, you think BIG! World domination, I hadn't even thought of that. You, Lacey and Zoe can be the brains and I will do all the undercover work. After all, I'm trained for it. HeeHeeHaaHaa! This is going to be fun! You can come with me as long as you don't get yourself caught or worse. Well I'm in the doghouse tonight. Mom came home from going to the pet food store and wasn't feeling good at all. Felt like getting sick. She wanted to take a nap and I wouldn't let her. Kept scratching her mattress and even got Lacey going at it. We wouldn't leave her alone so she ended up pretty ticked and didn't get to take her nap. Sorry momma! I think Lacey would be great at undercover work because she's the one who's SUPER sneaky! BIG TIME. Are you sure, Lacey in a cat burglar suit! I might get distracted. Sorry Gump, she's a pretty girl and I know she's yours. So don't worry. As much as Zoe sleeps, I don't think she'll be much help either. Tee hee, Thank you Zachy! MOL. I'll have to sharpen my nails and lock picking skills. But I'm darned good! Momma is ALWAYS after me because I'm into something I'm not supposed to be. Finney's good at opening doors with his big paws. Momma just weighed us last night and Finney is now 15 lbs of muscle. Big boy! The two of us are also good at breaking down doors. We give it our all every morning waking up mom at her bedroom door. She puts in her ear plugs and goes back to sleep for awhile. Then she gets up and yells, "stop, I'm coming already! jeez!" MOL. We're very persuasive. Wow, Mom started keeping the bedroom door open so one: we don't get locked out and scratch to get in and second: because I used to wake her up wanting out. Got to get that morning run in. Diamond always sleeps in with Dad. oh nose, if you need sneaky, you needs me! You'd think I'd be terrible at it cause I'm a big clumsy guy, but I'm actually super sneaky. My mommy and daddy call me 'Jason' after the scary movie guy with the hockey mask because I have a tendency to sneak up on peoples. I'll be sitting somewhere watching them, they'll turn around for a split second, and when the turn back, boom, I'm gone. Where'd I go? I'm sitting right behind them looking up at them inquisitively! Even though there is a bell on my collar and I tend to 'thunk' when I jump down, they sometimes never hear me moving. It's spooky! I'll never tell my secrets! Whoa! I did a triple take with all of you tuxies that are super floofy! MOL! River you sound really good at this sneaky stuff! You're in! Our plan is coming together nicely. u can take our poopies too we are the only two cats here and yet proudce enough poopies that momma has scoop once a day or it will stink we make sure momma gets to up to feed us in morning by running through the whole house meowing at the as loud as we can and if she still dont get up we go into her bedroom and meow as loud as we can and finally shes fine i get up |
Finnegan (Finney)
Family Pets
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March 2nd 2011 at 11:35 am