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The Tales and Tribulations of a Fat Cat

Good Yummy Human Food

I was thinking about all the good yummy human food i try to get my paws on. So heres my little list of the best human foods.

Meats:
1. Salmon (yum yum)
2. Tuna
3. Flounder, cod, white fish
4. Pork chop (da best)
5. Chicken
6. Lunch meats (ham is Goooood)
7. Shrimp (must be cooked, no raw fish for me, i have sophisticated tatses)

Dairy:
1. Vanilla Ice Cream :P
2. Oatmeal w/ milk
3. Milk (not that soy stuff, yuck)
4. Cheese (old cheese is good)
5. Cream cheese (ultimate)

Other Stuff:
1. Something called Chex (it's good try stealing some)
2. Bread (don't try the rye, eww)
3. French Fries (we all have our quirks)
4. Cake


Stuff to Avoid:
1. Yogurt (it tastes like bad milk)
2. Vegtables
3. Fruits
4. Soda (it makes bubbles go up your nose, no fun)
5. Beer (same as above)
6. Raw hamburger (yuck, should be cooked)
7. Non dairy creamer
8. Other yucky stuff

So see if you can steal any of this stuff today. I guarentee a good tasty hunt.

Human wants me to point out that I do not eat these things on a normal basis but yes I have tried all of them at some point. But some were just crumbs and some I hunted by waiting for humans to lower their guard.

Some days are not good days

This morning I went blaugh and food I ate yesterday came pouring out, how did that happens? I slept most of the day because it was very hot. My humans had to get the cold air fixed because it wasn't working. I think it was worse then. I hope I don't go blaugh again tomorrow. My belly did feel better after I did it though.

Non-Edible Food All Over da House

Mommy dropped a huge container of this red stuff all over the ground at dinner. I think the humans called it salsa. I went up to lick some because free food is free food. Well everyone was yelling at me not to eat it but it was ok because I wouldn't have touched it anyway. It smelled like a sweaty sock, eww. Hmm I wonder what it tastes like? Human sister was drinking some milky looking stuff so I had to investigate. Turns out it was disgusting milk that tasted like crap. I think she said it was called soy milk. All I know from now on if the white stuff doesn't come from a cow or goat don't touch it.